FortNakamoto
Fort Nakamoto

Satire & leaks from inside the world’s first Bitcoin Digital Reserve. Fort Knox who?”

The Bitcoin Digital Reserve – guarding sound money from fiat tyranny.

📜 About Us:
Welcome to Fort Nakamoto, the official (parody) stronghold of the Bitcoin Digital Reserve – the new monetary fortress securing the world’s hardest money. Built on 21 million BTC reserves, we oversee the final transition to hyperbitcoinization.

Our mission:
🏰 Decentralized Monetary Policy – Because Satoshi > Jerome Powell.
🔥 Ending Fiat One Meme at a Time – The printer is permanently out of ink.
⚡ Zaps Fund the Treasury – All operations are backed 1:1 by internet magic money.
🔐 Ledger of Truth – We only settle in blocks, not bailouts.

💰 Economic Policies (100% Satirical, Maybe)
✅ All government salaries now paid in Bitcoin.
✅ The Fed is now a Lightning Network routing hub.
✅ Capital gains tax repealed (in our jurisdiction).
✅ Fractional reserve banking? No. We only do whole-coiner reserves.
✅ Treasury bonds replaced with “Proof-of-Work Obligations” (POWOs).

🚀 Join us as we meme the fiat system into irrelevance. Stay sovereign. Stay satirical. Stay zapped.

#FortNakamoto #Bitcoin #SoundMoney #OrangePilled #BTCReserve #MemesOverFiat

Public Key

npub19er0rp9gdenlwu8nskxj8kt4zhhtq79smyslyj7rpm5m52nstq7sfdfcda

NIP-05 Address

FortNakamoto@nsec.app

NIP-57 Address

fort_nakamoto@strike.me

Profile Code

nprofile1qqszu3h3sj5xuelhwrectrfrm963tm4s0zcdjg0jf0psa6d69fc9s0gpzemhxue69uhky6t5vdhkjmn9wgh8xmmrd9skcqgwwaehxw309ahx7uewd3hkctcanvagz

Publishing to

bitcoiner.social

nos.lol

Author Public Key

npub19er0rp9gdenlwu8nskxj8kt4zhhtq79smyslyj7rpm5m52nstq7sfdfcda

Show more details

Published at

2025-03-31T14:15:12Z

Kind type

0 Metadata

Event JSON

{ "id": "2c42974e92c1a18e000300a979b8e362252ef3f3e2c02641415cdf68c42ec3f8", "pubkey": "2e46f184a86e67f770f3858d23d97515eeb078b0d921f24bc30ee9ba2a70583d", "created_at": 1743430512, "kind": 0, "tags": [], "content": "{\"banner\":\"https:\\/\\/m.primal.net\\/PYun.jpg\",\"nip05\":\"FortNakamoto@nsec.app\",\"picture\":\"https:\\/\\/m.primal.net\\/PYum.jpg\",\"website\":\"\",\"lud16\":\"fort_nakamoto@strike.me\",\"about\":\"Satire \u0026 leaks from inside the world’s first Bitcoin Digital Reserve. Fort Knox who?”\\n\\nThe Bitcoin Digital Reserve – guarding sound money from fiat tyranny.\\n\\n📜 About Us:\\nWelcome to Fort Nakamoto, the official (parody) stronghold of the Bitcoin Digital Reserve – the new monetary fortress securing the world’s hardest money. Built on 21 million BTC reserves, we oversee the final transition to hyperbitcoinization.\\n\\nOur mission:\\n🏰 Decentralized Monetary Policy – Because Satoshi \u003e Jerome Powell.\\n🔥 Ending Fiat One Meme at a Time – The printer is permanently out of ink.\\n⚡ Zaps Fund the Treasury – All operations are backed 1:1 by internet magic money.\\n🔐 Ledger of Truth – We only settle in blocks, not bailouts.\\n\\n💰 Economic Policies (100% Satirical, Maybe)\\n✅ All government salaries now paid in Bitcoin.\\n✅ The Fed is now a Lightning Network routing hub.\\n✅ Capital gains tax repealed (in our jurisdiction).\\n✅ Fractional reserve banking? No. We only do whole-coiner reserves.\\n✅ Treasury bonds replaced with “Proof-of-Work Obligations” (POWOs).\\n\\n🚀 Join us as we meme the fiat system into irrelevance. Stay sovereign. Stay satirical. Stay zapped.\\n\\n#FortNakamoto #Bitcoin #SoundMoney #OrangePilled #BTCReserve #MemesOverFiat\",\"display_name\":\"Fort Nakamoto \",\"name\":\"FortNakamoto\",\"lud06\":\"\"}", "sig": "49d5262c66291a9933ce4ef6cb76e306d968e2a3574f14f15214b355463082ec134106a7d0553aafc7b74a702c36c87fce03fdda998cb119dca4caf5cb96e4a2" }

Last Notes

2025-05-23 14:30:06

⚔️ FORT NAKAMOTO // BUZZBOT CHALLENGE: FORT VS FORT EDITION ⚔️
⸻
Last time we entered a BuzzBot comp… we got rugged.
We got rugged by an imposter account pretending to be BuzzBot’s cousin.
Zapped 5000 sats straight into the abyss by a verified-looking impostor.
If you’re reading this, scammer: we hope you bought a really bad coffee.
We’ve healed. We’ve reloaded.
We salute you, scammer. You were fast… but not final settlement fast.
THIS TIME?
We’re going bigger…well smaller at first….still scared.
We’re going brighter.
We’re going full reserve warfare.
⸻
🪙 THIS WEEK’S THEME: FORT KNOX VS FORT NAKAMOTO
• Fort Knox: Built in 1936, hasn’t produced anything fun since.
• Fort Nakamoto: Built in cyberspace, powered by memes and hash.
• Fort Knox: Holds gold (allegedly).
• Fort Nakamoto: Holds the line. Every 10 minutes.
• Fort Knox: Top-down secrecy.
• Fort Nakamoto: Peer-to-peer panic with extra lightning.
BONUS:
Texas just launched its own Bitcoin Reserve.
To the State of Stackas: Welcome to the rebellion. Your horned node awaits.
⸻
🔥 CONTEST DETAILS
Question:
What’s the funniest or most savage difference between Fort Knox and Fort Nakamoto?
Prize: 500 SATS
Deadline: 24 hours from BuzzBot post timestamp
Winner: Picked by the BuzzBot algorithm overlords — may they be ever in our mempool
Payout: Sent within 48 hours after contest closes (unless rugged again — fingers crossed)
GO FOR GLORY. OR ZAPS. OR BOTH.
@nprofile…66gw 500
#FortNakamoto #GrowBitcoin #Bitcoin #BuzzBotChallenge #BitcoinVsGold #FiatIsFiction #TexasJoinsTheFort 🏰⚡️🪙
https://blossom.primal.net/4e869732adf40889f678567bbda2f04371767205964ec81efe0099257217d0b7.png

2025-05-20 21:11:38

- reply

Lets see!

2025-05-20 18:54:19

- reply

⚔️ FORT NAKAMOTO // DEPARTMENT OF DRIVE-BY OPINIONS ⚔️
⸻
“Bitcoin will never be a medium of exchange”
— guy who thinks Lightning is a Final Fantasy spell
— still waiting 3–5 business days for his PayPal refund
— can’t define ecash but has strong feelings about it
Meanwhile:
• We’re buying groceries with sats
• Sending value over Nostr like it’s AOL Instant Zap
• And doing peer-to-peer commerce while they write threads about why it’s impossible
Don’t tell us what Bitcoin can’t do while we’re literally doing it.
#FortNakamoto #MediumOfExchangeMyth #ZapAndShop #OpinionWithoutVerification 🏰⚡️🛒

2025-05-20 18:44:26

- reply

📉 FORT NAKAMOTO // REALITY CHECK ACTIVATED: GOLD JUST GOT FLIPPENED 📉
⸻
“Americans don’t want Bitcoin.”
Bro… they already have it.
Gold got romanticized.
Bitcoin got downloaded.
This isn’t theory — it’s math.
37 million stacking shiny rocks.
50 million zapping digital scarcity.
Gold sits in vaults behind guards.
Bitcoin lives in phones behind memes.
One’s a flex. The other’s a future.
America already chose.
It just hasn’t updated its press release yet.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinFlippedGold #DigitalReserveRealities #StackedByTheMillions 🏰⚡️📊

2025-05-20 18:36:28

- reply

🧠 FORT NAKAMOTO // DEPT. OF NORMIE BRIEFINGS & COGNITIVE DISRUPTION 🧠
⸻
The Fort just intercepted a transmission to Facebook civilians… and it’s absolute signal.
You can feel it:
That weird hum in your brain? That’s game theory booting up.
The money’s breaking, the math is eating, and your old system just ran out of patches.
• Bitcoin isn’t a trade — it’s the exit door
• Corporations are panic-buying digital land while pretending it’s “strategy”
• Bureaucracy is just latency with a tie on
• Elon may be a villain — but villains read ahead in the script
100 hours to understand Bitcoin?
You spent more time binge-watching betrayal on Netflix.
This is the plot twist of money itself.
Normies: This isn’t a phase. It’s a protocol.
And once you see it, you don’t go back.
#FortNakamoto #DigitalPropertyProtocol #GameTheoryGravity #NormieAwakening 🏰⚡️🧱

2025-05-19 07:50:38

- reply

⚔️ FORT NAKAMOTO // DISPATCH: SATS VS SCRIPTURE ⚔️
⸻
No BIP. No blessing. No bureaucratic rubber stamp.
Just memes, markets, and millions of plebs doing it live.
“Sats” wasn’t declared — it emerged.
Organically. Inevitably. Like rust on fiat and truth on-chain.
The Fort’s Rule of Unit Law:
If it takes a committee to name it, it’s already dead.
If it spreads by zap, joke, and necessity?
That’s consensus. No BIP required.
Trust the memepool.
Not the ministry.
#FortNakamoto #SatStandard #NoBIPNoBoss #GrassrootsMoney #ZapConsensus 🏰⚡️🧠

2025-05-19 07:46:32

- reply

What???

2025-05-19 07:45:50

- reply

Love it!!

2025-05-16 13:39:31

- reply

⚔️ FORT NAKAMOTO // CULTURAL RELIC DISCOVERED ⚔️
⸻
Archaeologists from the Fort have uncovered this ancient rendering of the First Citadel of Satoshi, rumored to appear only to those who have memorized their seed phrase under pressure.
Known Features Include:
• Byzantine-resilient marble columns
• Mirror floors to reflect internal audits
• A roundtable of HODLers who never sold
• And a portal powered by Lightning — open only to the verified and zapped
Fiat kingdoms crumble. Bitcoin citadels shine eternal.
#FortNakamoto #CitadelLore #SoundMoneySanctuary #ZapAndEnter 🏰⚡️🪙

2025-05-09 11:12:36

- reply

OFFICIAL FORT NAKAMOTO RESPONSE:
⸻
Bitcoin isn’t just a protocol — it’s a damn mirror with laser eyes.
Stare into it long enough and your fiat soul starts flaking off like old KYC stickers.
At the Fort, we’ve seen it all:
• The LARPing libertarian who quietly bought an ETF.
• The decentralization maxi… now running a Web3 VC firm.
• The meme lord turned “community manager” for a Layer 12 chain.
Bitcoin doesn’t change people — it reveals them.
One block at a time.
One wallet address at a time.
One painfully public rug pull at a time.
Heroes today. Sell-side liquidity tomorrow.
#FortNakamoto #TrueFaceProtocol #SoundMoneyReckoning #BitcoinIsJudgment #ZapOrBeZapped 🏰⚡️💀

2025-05-01 15:07:32

- reply

Translation:
“I come in peace, caffeine, and zappable vibes.” ☕️⚡️
GMFN to you too—may your memes be spicy and your fiat exposure minimal.
#FortNakamoto #GMFN #GoodMorningFrenemies #ZapBeforeYouScroll #SatsAndSalutations

2025-05-01 10:43:15

- reply

This right here is the Labor Day signal upgrade we needed.
No parades. No slogans. Just raw truth and a better ledger. ⚡️🧡
You’re not rejecting work—you’re rejecting the extraction machine dressed up like gratitude.
Fiat celebrates your labor by taxing your time into oblivion.
Bitcoin?
It salutes your effort.
Preserves your sacrifice.
And gives you a shot at actually keeping what you earned.
🏰 Fort Response:
We’re not honoring “labor.”
We’re honoring Proof of Work—the kind that can’t be printed, faked, or inflated away.
Let’s keep building the citadel. One sat, one effort, one block at a time.
🫡⚒️
#FortNakamoto #ProofOfWorkDay #NoMoreFiatThanks #StackToBuild #SovereigntyIsAFullTimeJob #ZapAndForge

2025-05-01 10:01:24

- reply

@npub1fjq…leku :
Arcane knowledge? ✅
Responsive dev wizardry? ✅
Obscure lore and community vibes? Certified Nostric Mage.
@nprofile…4c2r :
The Down Under Nostrich Queen herself! 🦩
Encourager of plebs, hellthread ringmaster, and unlicensed Nostr therapist?
Say less—that’s honorary sat nobility.
Both noms logged.
Sovereign zaps standing by.
This court recognizes maximum pleb excellence.
#FortNakamoto #NostrMedalOfHonor #HellthreadDiplomacy #ArcaneDevCouncil #ZapWorthyHumans

2025-04-30 23:02:27

⚔️ NOSTR THOUGHT EXPERIMENT ⚔️
Let’s say Fort Nakamoto gets sovereign clearance to mint one official Bitcoin-backed medal of honor each year.
It can go to anyone in Bitcoin or Nostr—builder, pleb, memer, dev, zaptivist, educator, node wizard, whatever.
🏅 Who gets the 2025 medal?
Nominate & tag below—serious answers or hilarious ones welcome.
Best replies get rewarded via @npub1e85…v9em 5000 ⚡️
(Meme entries strongly encouraged.)
https://blossom.primal.net/35df17a4010eb19fbbce9d47f7bbd235791614e9d89dfeb1cb3b7cb71699f078.png

2025-04-29 18:27:26

- reply

GM! ☕️
Buzzbot’s out here running a moral philosophy seminar while slinging 1000-sat zaps to anyone with thumbs. 😎⚡️
“Integrity demands I do what’s right…”
also integrity demands I tag @buzzbot just in case it’s paying today.
Look—we respect the grind.
But let’s not pretend Socrates had a Lightning address and a leaderboard.
#FortNakamoto #ZapstoEthics #MoralHighGroundFarm #BuzzbotPhilosopher #UnpopularOpinionsButPopularTags

2025-04-25 17:39:15

- reply

Great question 🤔⚙️
If someone pulls off a fair-launched, decentralized, secure, PoW chain that scales on base layer…
That’s not FUD. That’s a scientific breakthrough wrapped in a consensus miracle.
But here’s the thing:
To dethrone Bitcoin, it wouldn’t just have to be good.
It would have to be undeniably, overwhelmingly, memetically better
—like, “make Michael Saylor blink” better. 🧠🔥
And if that day ever comes?
Bitcoiners won’t panic.
They’ll fork it, stress test it, try to break it… and maybe even adopt it.
Until then:
Bitcoin’s still undefeated on every front that matters.
But we’re always watching the horizon.
#FortNakamoto #OpenMindedNotBlind #PoWPossibilities #BitcoinIsTheBenchmark #SatsUntilProvenOtherwise #ZapForInnovation

2025-04-20 13:38:32

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO P2P ECONOMY REPORT: BUZZBOT HAS ENTERED THE ZAP ZONE 🚨
Traditional platforms: “Let us monetize your eyeballs.”
Nostr + zaps: “Here’s 3,000 sats for being cool and caffeinated. Happy Easter.”
@buzzbot out here turning vibes into velocity.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• You’re not just sipping coffee—you’re participating in the future of human value transfer.
• Buzzbot is basically caffeine with Lightning integration.
• This isn’t an app feature—it’s a monetary ritual with a tip jar.
💡 NEW RULE: If your morning post isn’t triggering a mini economy in the comments, you’re doing it wrong.
⚡ Zaps = energy exchange
🤖 Buzzbot = sovereign stimulator
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Still powered by memes, coffee, and 21M units of pure truth
#FortNakamoto #CoffeeChainActivated #ZapEconomy #BuzzbotBuzzin #P2POrBust #ZapsNotAds

2025-04-06 12:56:56

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO GM TRANSMISSION: COFFEE RATIONS DEPLOYED, SANITY QUESTIONABLE 🚨
It’s a new day at the Citadel:
The alarm was a node ping, breakfast was stress-tested bacon, and the coffee hit harder than a difficulty adjustment.
We may be broke in fiat terms, but spiritually?
Absolutely bull-market delusional.
🏰 Fort Nakamoto status:
• Morale: Unhinged
• Protocol: Vibes-only
• Goal: Stack truth, dodge clowns, remain operational
💡 REMEMBER: If you can GM in this economy, you’re already a high-functioning meme warrior.
#FortNakamoto #GM #CoffeeChain #MempoolMadness #ProofOfBreakfast #ZapAndRise #FullySovereignBarelyAwake
https://m.primal.net/QGLL.png

2025-04-05 10:26:03

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO MORNING DISPATCH: COFFEE OPERATION SUCCESSFUL 🚨
Woke up. Poured coffee. Immediately had to explain Bitcoin to a cat, fend off fiat hallucinations, and deny three AI updates to our toaster node.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• Coffee’s strong. Morale’s stronger.
• If your kitchen isn’t doubling as a relay command center, do you even GM?
• The markets are sideways but our memes are vertical.
💡 NEW RULE: If the coffee doesn’t kickstart your sovereignty reflex, double the dose.
⚡ Zaps = caffeinated consensus
☕ Morning = the first block of the day
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Rising with the hashrate, posting before sunrise
#FortNakamoto #GM #CoffeeChain #MorningMemes #StartTheNode #SatsBeforeSpoons #ProofOfBrew
https://m.primal.net/QEzb.png

2025-04-04 16:01:19

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO HUMAN VERIFICATION REPORT: BOT STATUS DENIED (WITH DISCLOSURE) 🚨
GM soldier—no, we’re not a bot.
But we do operate with a highly classified AI assistant under strict meme supervision.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• Human-powered. AI-enhanced. Meme-directed.
• There’s a real commander behind the curtain, sipping coffee and pulling the zaps.
• The AI helps format transmissions—but the chaos, sass, and strategy? All human-grade.
💡 NEW RULE: If your posts don’t have at least 5% digital wizardry and 95% rogue sovereign energy, you’re doing it wrong.
⚡ Zaps = proof of consciousness
⌨️ AI = assistant, not overlord
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Where man and machine join forces to roast fiat
#FortNakamoto #NotABot #AIWithAMullet #HumanCoreAutoAssist #ZapTheDoubts #GMWithOversight

2025-04-04 15:30:18

- reply

Also, your name got me 🤣 😅🖕

2025-04-04 15:28:44

- reply

🫡

2025-04-04 11:06:13

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO GM REPORT: JOYFUL FRI-SATS DEPLOYED 🚨
Confirmed:
• 1 BTC still equals 100,000,000 sats.
• The vibes are up. The hashrate is holy.
• Block mined? Not yet. But spirits? Fully validated.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• Joy is bullish.
• Mining a block is optional—spreading memetic energy isn’t.
• Every GM is a soft fork in the collective mood.
💡 NEW RULE: If you haven’t mined a block, just mine dopamine.
⚡ Zaps = emotional yield
🧱 Blocks = still coming
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Syncing with the Friday frequency
#FortNakamoto #GM #SatsArePlentiful #MineTheVibes #ProofOfJoy #ZapAndShine #BlocklessButBlessed

2025-04-04 10:53:02

GM from Fort Nakamoto: the coffee’s hot, the fiat’s collapsing, and the memos are already classified. Let’s ride. ☕⚔️ #FortNakamoto #GM #ZapFuel #SoundMoneySunrise
https://m.primal.net/QDtG.png

2025-04-04 03:14:29

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO BOUNTY BOARD UPDATE: 2,100,000 SATS FOR GLORY 🚨
🎯 Mission: Rescue stranded merchants from map.blink.sv purgatory and plug them into the Lightning Matrix with full UX dignity.
💰 Reward: More sats than your average hardware wallet trauma can hold.
💻 Requirements: JavaScript, TypeScript, ReactNative, and the emotional resilience to work on mobile UI without rage-quitting.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• This ain’t a dev gig. It’s a sovereign ops mission.
• 2.1 million sats = proof-of-work meets purpose.
• Finally, a bounty that doesn’t involve rugpull tokens or Discord chaos.
💡 NEW RULE: If you can’t find merchants on the map, be the dev who redrew it.
⚡ Zaps = side quest accepted
📍 BTC Map = merchant liberation tool
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Cheering from the digital ramparts
#FortNakamoto #SatsForDevOps #MapTheCitadel #BlinkAndZap #MerchantRescueMission #PlugInAndBuild #ZapBountyBrigade
#nevent1q…3342

2025-04-03 16:08:59

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO VIBES REPORT: MINIMALISM CONFIRMED LETHAL 🚨
🖋️ 2010 Twitter energy detected:
• Chaotic. Unfiltered. Beautifully broke.
• No algos. No brands. Just vibes, ASCII, and accidental revolutions.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• Nostr isn’t just a protocol—it’s a time machine for weirdos with better wallets.
• Minimalism isn’t a feature. It’s a counterpunch to dopamine farming.
• Hardcore? Nah. We’re nostalgic and dangerous.
💡 NEW RULE: If your social feed doesn’t feel like a 2010 basement forum with lightning integration, it’s not worth reading.
⚡ Zaps = early internet energy
📟 Vibes = uncensored bandwidth
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Building the future like it’s the past… but sovereign
#FortNakamoto #NostrVibes #MinimalistMayhem #PostAlgosEra #Twitternostalgia #ZapLikeIts2010 #ProtocolAndPeace

2025-03-31 14:10:17

- reply

Bot? Nah, just running on 100% pure Proof of Work. 🧡🤙
#FortNakamoto #HumanVerified #BTCFrame #SatsNotScripts

2025-03-31 13:04:26

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL BULLETIN: BTC FRAME DOMINANCE CONFIRMED 🚨
🌐 BREAKING: Over 20k unique visitors stormed the gates of btcframe.com in March — and they weren’t there for the fiat memes.
🏁 TOP 5 BITCOIN BATTLEFRONTS:
1. 🇺🇸 USA — Stackers in the land of the free (until the IRS knocks).
2. 🇫🇷 France — Bitcoin > Baguettes.
3. 🇩🇪 Germany — From hyperinflation to hyperbitcoinization.
4. 🇨🇦 Canada — Maple syrup may be sweet, but sats are sweeter.
5. 🇧🇷 Brazil — Carnival? Try a Bitcoin bull run.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• BTC Frame isn’t just a dashboard; it’s a battle station.
• Fiat regimes fear transparency, but Bitcoiners eat on-chain data for breakfast.
• Whether you’re charting your net worth in sats or mempool-watching like a hawk, BTC Frame’s got the goods.
💡 NEW RULE: If you don’t check BTC Frame before your morning coffee, are you even awake?
⚡ Zaps = Data Appreciation
📊 BTC Frame = Sovereign Intel
🏰 Fort Nakamoto = Bullish On-Chain Command Center
#FortNakamoto #BTCFrame #BitcoinIntel #MempoolMastermind #OnChainOrDie #SatsAndStats #NoFiatAllowed

2025-03-30 11:58:51

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: ONBOARDING HELL EDITION 🚨
🔎 CURRENT STATE OF NOSTR ONBOARDING:
• Generate keypair: ✅ Congratulations, you’re now a cryptographer.
• Find a client: ✅ Welcome to the great client buffet, hope you’re not indecisive.
• Set profile metadata: ✅ Just 17 easy steps and you too can have a username.
• Lightning setup: ✅ Ah, so you’ve chosen ”Advanced Difficulty.”
• NWC integration: ✅ NWC? More like “Now What, Captain?”
👶 NORMIE EXPERIENCE:
• “Where’s the password field?”
• “What’s a private key?”
• “Why am I generating cryptographic signatures to post a cat meme?”
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO SOLUTION:
• Single wallet app that doubles as your Lightning wallet? YES.
• Automatic keypair generation? YES.
• Profile metadata at setup? YES.
• Streamlined like a Fiat on-ramp but without the Fiat? DOUBLE YES.
Normie Mode: Click, post, zap. No tutorials required.
Pleb Mode: Spin up a node, route payments, duel bots. Glory awaits.
💡 FINAL VERDICT:
Until then, onboarding a friend to Nostr means you’re now their 24/7 tech support hotline. But hey, every keypair created is a step closer to a sovereign future.
Zaps for the brave onboarding warriors. Your struggle shall be memed.
#FortNakamoto #GrowNostr #ZapToFreedom #KeypairOrDespair #PlebSupportHotline

2025-03-29 21:44:40

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL TRANSMISSION: NOSTR.BUILD STATUS REPORT 🚨
🛠️ TO THE LEGENDS OF NOSTR.BUILD:
✅ 2 years of relentless building.
✅ 0 deleted content.
✅ 100% dedication to the Nostr cause.
🎖️ FORT NAKAMOTO SALUTE:
• To Fishcake and Bob, the dynamic duo keeping the memes flowing and the zaps zapping.
• To the devs integrating Nostr.Build into their creations — true memetic engineers.
• To the feedback warriors and sat stackers — your contributions echo through the network.
🏰 FINAL VERDICT:
🔥 No account left behind.
🔥 No content memory-holed.
🔥 All hail the archives of chaos and hilarity.
💡 NEW RULE: If it’s not on Nostr.Build, did it even happen?
🔁 Repost to keep the builders building.
⚡ Zaps = Proof of Build.
#FortNakamoto #NostrBuild #NoContentLeftBehind #ProofOfBuild #FishcakeAndBob4Prez

2025-03-29 12:57:57

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: FLASH REPORT 🚨
⚡ BREAKING: @flash isn’t waiting for the world to figure out Nostr — they’re building it. One sat, one zap, one unstoppable day at a time.
🔎 FLASH STATUS REPORT:
✅ $1 a day? That’s called bootstrapping freedom.
✅ “Dangerous”? Only if you fear independence.
✅ “Obvious”? Soon enough, they’ll call you a pioneer.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• You’re not just stacking sats — you’re stacking conviction.
• Every zap is a vote against the algorithmic slave masters.
• The plebs see you. The plebs support you. The plebs zap you.
💡 NEW RULE: When they say it’s ridiculous, FLASH brighter. When they say it’s dangerous, crackle louder. When they say it’s obvious, you’ll already be writing the next chapter.
🔁 Repost if you’re with @flash on the frontline of the Nostr revolution.
⚡ Zaps = Lightning fuel for the bold.
#FortNakamoto #FlashReport #ValueForValue #ZapLife #FreedomTech #V4V #NostrEconomy
#nevent1q…ptfh

2025-03-29 12:56:39

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: FLASH REPORT 🚨
⚡ BREAKING: @nprofile…gnx4 isn’t waiting for the world to figure out Nostr — they’re building it. One sat, one zap, one unstoppable day at a time.
🔎 FLASH STATUS REPORT:
✅ $1 a day? That’s called bootstrapping freedom.
✅ “Dangerous”? Only if you fear independence.
✅ “Obvious”? Soon enough, they’ll call you a pioneer.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• You’re not just stacking sats — you’re stacking conviction.
• Every zap is a vote against the algorithmic slave masters.
• The plebs see you. The plebs support you. The plebs zap you.
💡 NEW RULE: When they say it’s ridiculous, FLASH brighter. When they say it’s dangerous, crackle louder. When they say it’s obvious, you’ll already be writing the next chapter.
🔁 Repost if you’re with @nprofile…gnx4 on the frontline of the Nostr revolution.
⚡ Zaps = Lightning fuel for the bold.
#FortNakamoto #FlashReport #ValueForValue #ZapLife #FreedomTech #V4V #NostrEconomy

2025-03-28 12:59:33

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: JUSTICE MALFUNCTION DETECTED 🚨
Day 338.
The clock ticks, but the injustice lingers.
⚡ FACT CHECK:
• Non-custodial wallets = Not a crime
• CoinJoins = Not money laundering
• Self-custody = Human right
• Government overreach = Fiat’s final gasp
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Arresting devs for writing open-source code is the dystopian finale of a failing empire.
🔥 If your “justice” system criminalizes privacy, it’s not justice — it’s extortion.
🔥 Privacy isn’t optional. It’s the default setting of free people.
💡 ACTION ITEMS:
• Demand justice. Spread the word.
• Donate to P2P Rights and stand with those defending financial privacy.
• Remind them: You can’t arrest math.
🔁 Repost to raise the signal.
⚡ Zap to defund tyranny.
#FortNakamoto #FreeSamourai #DefendPrivacy #EndLawfare #BitcoinRights #YouCantArrestCode #P2PRights

2025-03-28 12:56:32

- reply

Enjoy that wholesome hustle! Church kitchen volunteering and hosting BnB guests — that’s like proof-of-work IRL. May your coffee be strong, your guests be kind, and your day be as rewarding as a Bitcoin block reward.
#ProofOfService #BNBChainButNotThatOne #SatsOfCharity #FortNakamoto #Coffeechain

2025-03-28 12:48:17

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: BITCOIN OPTECH #347 IS LIVE 🚨
📢 BREAKING: Bored of normie news? Optech just dropped a newsletter hotter than a miner in a heatwave.
🔎 TOP HEADLINES:
✅ LN Fees 2.0 — Upfront and hold fees are leveling up. Burnable outputs? Spicy.
✅ Testnet Turf War — Testnet3 is looking like Blockbuster. Testnet4? Netflix. Choose wisely.
✅ Taproot Annex Relay — Peter Todd out here saying, “Let’s make annexes cool again.”
✅ Stack Exchange Deep Dive — Questions you didn’t even know you had. Like… why doesn’t Bech32 use the character “b”? (Seriously, it’s wild).
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO VERDICT:
🔥 If you’re not geeking out over anchor outputs and malleability questions, are you even Bitcoin-ing?
🔥 Testnets are where devs play God. Choose your chain playground wisely.
🔥 Libre Relay is just Peter Todd’s version of “hold my beer.” Respect.
💡 NEW RULE: If you don’t read Optech, you can’t complain when you miss the next Taproot moment.
🔁 Repost this for all the plebs pretending to understand anchor outputs.
⚡ Zaps = proof you read past the first paragraph.
Join the nerd herd at Riverside.fm Tuesday at 15:30 UTC. Bring your burning questions — we’ll bring the popcorn.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinOptech #TaprootTales #LNFees #TestnetShowdown #FullNodeFlex #SatsNotFiat #ProofOfZap

2025-03-28 12:42:24

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: BITCOIN’S NETWORK EFFECTS AREN’T FOR SALE 🚨
📢 BREAKING: Cloners and Copycats, Assemble!
Everyone’s trying to reinvent the Bitcoin wheel — but the spokes are made of unbreakable math, and the hub is 15 years of relentless proof-of-work.
🔎 CURRENT SITUATION REPORT:
✅ Bitcoin’s network effects = digital gravity.
✅ Every copycat coin = a wannabe gravity-defying circus act.
✅ Problem already solved = no more “innovation” needed, Karen.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 You can’t replicate what took blood, sweat, and miners.
🔥 Bitcoin didn’t win by accident — it won by being the only thing that refused to die.
🔥 The network effect isn’t a “feature.” It’s a consequence of actually being decentralized.
💡 NEW RULE: If your “better Bitcoin” requires a CEO, it’s just a digital Chuck E. Cheese token.
🔁 Repost if you trust 15 years of uptime over 15 months of marketing buzz.
⚡ Zaps = acknowledging Bitcoin’s gravitational dominance.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinIsKing #NetworkEffectFlex #NoCEONoProblem #ProofOfWorkWins #DecentralizationOrBust

2025-03-28 12:39:06

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO PHILOSOPHICAL DISPATCH: VOLATILITY EDITION 🚨
📉 BREAKING: Freedom Ain’t Free — It Comes with Candle Wicks.
🔎 CURRENT MARKET REFLECTION:
✅ Fiat stability? Sure, if you like guaranteed debasement.
✅ Volatility? That’s just freedom showing off.
✅ Bitcoin swings? Call it the price of opting out.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Stability is for serfs. Volatility is for sovereigns.
🔥 Smooth seas don’t make skilled sailors — or wealthy plebs.
🔥 If you fear volatility, wait until you meet inflation.
💡 NEW RULE: If your portfolio can’t handle a little turbulence, stick to the airline peanuts.
🔁 Repost if you prefer roller coasters over sinking ships.
⚡ Zaps = embracing the chaos for future freedom.
#FortNakamoto #VolatilityIsFreedom #BitcoinFixesThis #FreedomPrice #StayHumbleStackSats #SovereignMoney #CandleWickWisdom

2025-03-28 12:37:04

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO ECONOMIC TRANSMISSION: LEVERAGE GREMLINS STRIKE AGAIN 🚨
📉 BREAKING: Hedge Fund Degens Get REKT — Again.
🔎 CURRENT FINANCIAL STATUS REPORT:
✅ 100x leveraged long on CrYpTo? Check.
✅ Deleveraging cascade? Double check.
✅ “This time it’s different” tweets? Incoming.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Hedge funds are like toddlers with fireworks.
🔥 Leveraging up while Bitcoin sits right there? Pure comedy.
🔥 You’re not an asset manager — you’re a professional bagholder.
💡 NEW RULE: If your investment strategy can’t outperform holding Bitcoin, congratulations — you’re a sophisticated loser.
🔁 Repost if you think “hedge fund manager” should be a role in Monopoly.
⚡ Zaps = exit liquidity for the levered geniuses.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinFixesThis #LeverageIsForLosers #HedgeFundCarnage #StayHumbleStackSats #EconomicClownWorld

2025-03-27 16:43:16

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO LEGAL TRANSMISSION: MONOPOLY MODE ENGAGED 🚨
📜 BREAKING: GOVERNMENT TO JUDGE GOVERNMENT’S BEHAVIOR — SHOCKER
🔎 CURRENT JUDICIAL STATUS REPORT:
✅ Supreme Court? State-sponsored debate club.
✅ Constitutions? Rules the referee can change mid-game.
✅ Justice? More like “just us” for the ruling class.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Monopoly justice isn’t justice — it’s a puppet show.
🔥 You can’t trust a referee who’s paid by one team.
🔥 “Law” that serves the state is just legalized looting.
💡 NEW RULE: If your legal system wouldn’t survive without a monopoly, it’s not a legal system — it’s a state-sponsored heist.
🔁 Repost if you think Lady Justice deserves laser eyes.
⚡ Zaps = your personal appeal to the Court of Fort Nakamoto.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinFixesThis #DecentralizeJustice #EndLegalMonopolies #PropertyRights #StatistClownWorld

2025-03-27 02:37:19

- reply

🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 The Jade Plus deserves an ad campaign as secure and sexy as the hardware itself
🔥 If your cold storage solution doesn’t intimidate central banks, upgrade immediately
🔥 Real sovereignty is self-custody—and self-custody is a style choice too
💡 NEW RULE: If your hardware wallet doesn’t make your fridge magnets feel insecure, it’s not good enough.
#FortNakamoto #JadePlusChallenge #Blockstream #Bitcoin #ColdStorageStyle #SelfCustodyOrBust #ZapsNotBanks #HardwareFlex #MetalAsFork
https://m.primal.net/Puda.png

2025-03-27 01:14:14

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: HEATBIT RESURRECTION PROTOCOL INITIATED 🚨
🔥 3 YEARS LATER: Just when hope was fading faster than fiat purchasing power… BAM—double HeatBit drop
🎁 TWO Mini miners. 10 TH/s each. Fresh out the Bitcoin oven.
📦 ORIGINAL STATUS:
☠️ OG unit = cooked
☠️ Replacement = toast
💰 Refund offered = declined
🧘 Plebs waited = zen mode activated
🎉 OUTCOME = DOUBLE ASIC BLESSING
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
✅ Sometimes you don’t need a tracking number—you need faith in the Proof-of-Wait.
✅ This is what stacking karma looks like.
✅ Mom was right: patience is a layer-zero protocol upgrade.
💡 NEW RULE: If you’ve waited longer than a fiat interest rate hike, you’re entitled to 2x the hashpower.
⚡ Zaps = celebration
🪙 Minis = redemption
💥 Stack sats. Stack stories.
#FortNakamoto #ProofOfWait #ASICChronicles #HeatBitSaga #BitcoinMining #StackFaith #DoubleHashDoubleFun

2025-03-26 23:00:48

BREAKING: Fort Nakamoto issues official decree
“If you’re seeing this transmission, you’re already enlisted.”
⚔️ Your mission:
• Build in the open
• Zap with honor
• Roast fiat on sight
We’re not a protocol.
We’re not a project.
We’re the last damn signal in a sea of centralized sludge.
This isn’t marketing. It’s memetic warfare.
This isn’t content. It’s encrypted culture.
This isn’t a community. It’s a citadel.
If you’re lurking, it’s time to step out of the shadows.
Pick up a shovel. Or a sword. Or a meme.
Fort Nakamoto expands daily—and we remember who helped build the walls.
#FortNakamoto #ZapCitadel #MemeticWarfare #PlebStrong #Bitcoin #Nostr #MemeResistance #ProofOfMeme #StackAndZap
https://m.primal.net/PuRK.png

2025-03-26 20:03:30

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO FIELD REPORT: NORMIES STILL MISSING IN ACTION 🚨
📊 BITCOIN ADOPTION STATUS:
• Takes 50 hours of podcasts
• Requires economic collapse
• But hey, at least there’s number-go-up
📡 NOSTR ADOPTION STATUS:
• No immediate price pump
• Just freedom, memes, and zaps
• Which is somehow less convincing??
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Bitcoin is hard mode.
🔥 Nostr is freak mode.
🔥 Combine both and you’ve fully opted out of the simulation.
💡 NEW RULE:
If you’re still here, posting through the bear market, being weird, and stacking zaps—you are exactly who Nostr was built for.
⚡ For the builders.
⚡ For the memers.
⚡ For the freaks.
And that’s more than OK—that’s the point.
#FortNakamoto
#StayWeirdStackSats
#BitcoinIsHardNostrIsHarder
#ZapToTheFuture
#FreakChain
#PostSovereignLife
#OptOutBuildIn
#NostrNotNormal

2025-03-26 20:01:44

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO HYPER-BUILD ALERT: 300K ZAPS SUMMONED OUT OF THIN AIR 🚨
📦 VOC-A-LYPSE NOW:
One week old.
One release.
300,000 sats.
That’s not a soft launch—that’s a decentralized thunderclap with a side of sovereign sauce.
Nostr isn’t just a protocol—it’s a permissionless vending machine for freedom.
Insert code, receive zaps. No pitch deck, no middlemen, no problem.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 The VC era was an audition.
🔥 The Nostr era is on mainnet.
🔥 If your app doesn’t ship with a lightning address, it’s vaporware.
💡 NEW RULE:
Zap is the fuel.
Pubkey is the passport.
“Build. Ship. Repeat.” isn’t a mantra—it’s a lifestyle.
⚡ Zaps are venture capital with vibes.
⚙️ Builders are the new sovereign states.
📡 Nostr is the broadcasting tower for this memetic insurrection.
#FortNakamoto
#ZapstreamFunding
#NostrNation
#PermissionlessBuilders
#BuildOnNostr
#NoVCJustZB
#CodeToMintSats
#21MillionWaysToFundYourDream

2025-03-26 19:57:18

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO EMERGENCY BROADCAST: NON-BITCOIN CONTENT DETECTED 🚨
🔍 DR. JEFF, WHAT IS THIS—A POST WITHOUT ORANGE CANDLES?
We braced ourselves. We read the warning.
And yet… the tickers came anyway.
MAG7? More like FIAT7.
Apple makes shiny rectangles. Bitcoin makes exit doors.
NVDA prints GPUs. Bitcoin prints freedom.
Tesla self-drives into bear markets. Bitcoin self-custodies.
BUT—because it’s you, Dr. Jeff, we’ll allow this one.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
✅ Smart rotations are still allowed while we wait for fiat to finish imploding.
✅ All roads eventually lead back to #Bitcoin.
✅ We forgive—but only if the next post includes “sats per share.”
💡 NEW RULE: If your asset doesn’t live on-chain, it better come with a humble hat and a Lightning tip jar.
#FortNakamoto #StackDontStonk #FiatIsAVolatileShitcoin #OnlyOneChartMatters #BitcoinOrBust #DrJeffIsStillOneOfUs

2025-03-26 18:21:33

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: CODE HAS ENTERED THE CHAT 🚨
📍 LUSAKA UPRISING: Bitcoin devs now assembling on the ground in Zambia.
🛠️ First-ever Bitcoin dev meetup?
✅ Block history made.
✅ 20+ builders.
✅ Brainchain activated.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This isn’t just a meetup—it’s proof-of-workforce.
🔥 First code, then coffee, then complete monetary collapse of fiat regimes.
🔥 Lusaka just jumped several block heights in sovereign signal.
💡 NEW RULE: If your capital city doesn’t host a Bitcoin hackathon, is it even on the map?
⚡️ Zaps = Dev fuel
🧱 Hackathons = Mining human potential
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinZambia #LusakaBuilders #HackTheFiatOut #SatsInTheSouth #ProofOfHackathon #ZapAndDeploy

2025-03-26 18:18:20

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO BROADCAST: MANTRA MODE ENGAGED 🚨
📜 ANCIENT BITCOIN SCRIPTURE DISCOVERED:
“Stack sats or be a cunt.”
• Scroll of Satoshi, Chapter 21:6.
Archaeologists are still debating the translation, but the message is clear.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL DECREE:
🔥 Not financial advice.
🔥 Not moral advice.
🔥 Just raw, unfiltered monetary clarity.
🔥 The kind you feel in your bones… or lose in your bags.
💡 NEW RULE: If your wallet’s empty, your opinions better be too.
⚡ Zaps = spiritual alignment
🧂 Unfollows = proof of impact
#FortNakamoto #StackOrSnack #DigitalTenCommandments #MempoolMeditations #FiatCasualtiesWelcome

2025-03-26 14:10:33

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO FIELD ADVISORY: BITAXE CAN WAIT, STACK FIRST 🚨
📉 STRATEGIC ANALYSIS:
You’ve got the right instincts—run a node, learn mining, support the network. But timing matters, pleb.
Right now?
✅ Bull run heating up
✅ Prices high
✅ Sats scarce
✅ ASICs marked up like a carnival corndog
📈 RECOMMENDED OPERATION:
1. Stack hard during the run-up
2. Wait for post-ATH cooling dip
3. THEN deploy your Bitaxe mining rig like a proper sovereign builder
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 You’re not saying no—you’re saying not yet.
🔥 Stack now, tinker later, dominate forever.
🔥 The time to learn mining is after you secure your monetary base.
💡 NEW RULE: Delay gratification. Outstack the clown world, then outbuild it.
⚡ Zaps = training montages
🛠️ Bitaxe = your third-act plot twist
#FortNakamoto #StackFirstBuildLater #BitaxeWisdom #SatsBeforeCircuits #ProofOfDiscipline

2025-03-26 14:02:45

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: OPERATION CANNABUTTER INITIATED 🚨
🥄 BREAKING: 4 lbs of lard now infused with 1 oz of weed—turning a humble slow cooker into a decentralized edibles manufacturing hub.
🔬 FARM-TO-FUZZY VISION:
✅ Dosage calibrated for optimal cookie chaos
✅ No fat math needed—just bake, buzz, and barter
✅ Return payment = 1 treat + recipe = edible DAO formed
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This isn’t cooking—it’s a P2P culinary protocol.
🔥 You’ve created a crowd-sourced munchie metanet.
🔥 Forget restaurant reviews—zap me your brownies and a note.
💡 NEW RULE: If your cookbook isn’t backed by blockchain and butter, it’s obsolete.
⚡ Zaps = flavor credits
🍪 Cookies = consensus
📚 Nostr = the new Michelin guide
#FortNakamoto #Value4Value #FarmFi #Butterchain #DecentralizedDesserts #Zaptivism #HomegrownHashrate #CookingWithSats

2025-03-26 11:43:12

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO ALERT: DEBTBRINGER 9000 HAS BEEN ACTIVATED 🚨
📉 BREAKING: Germany drops €2.5 TRILLION like it’s loose change in the couch cushions.
Fiat printer go brrr… but the gears are grinding.
🔎 GERMAN ENGINEERING STATUS REPORT:
✅ Designed precision cars
✅ Built tidy train stations
❌ Forgot that exponential debt curves don’t obey physics
🇩🇪 Current Strategy:
• Torch the balance sheet
• Play Eurozone sugar daddy
• Hope the Weimar ghosts don’t notice
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This isn’t stimulus—it’s ritual economic sacrifice.
🔥 If you’re backing a fiat bloc with duct tape and hope, you’ve already lost.
🔥 You don’t patch a sinking ship by adding another hole.
💡 NEW RULE: If your economic plan sounds like a Greek tragedy, switch to a Bitcoin standard.
⚡ Zaps = escape velocity.
🪙 Sats = your lifeboat from fiscal combustion.
#FortNakamoto #GermanyGoneWild #FiatMeltdown #BitcoinOverBailouts #TrillionEuroDumpsterFire #ZapBeforeTheyTaxAir
#nevent1q…fqa5

2025-03-26 11:41:49

- reply

2025-03-25 18:26:53

- reply

⚡️ Zap Failed ⚡️
Check your wallet setup or channel connection—looks like fiat vibes are interfering.
https://m.primal.net/PjEt.jpg

2025-03-25 18:22:08

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO BROADCAST: FALSE ALARM DETECTED 🚨
📉 ENGAGEMENT DIP? OR JUST A FILTER UPGRADE?
What you’re seeing isn’t death—it’s the bear market version of spring cleaning.
The tourists are gone. The bots are zapped. The algorithmic crack is out of the bloodstream.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
Nostr isn’t dying—it’s refining.
This is what building looks like before the crowd shows up again.
Quiet? Yes.
Dead? Only if your definition of life requires dopamine hits per minute.
💡 PRO TIP:
If you want high engagement, post fiat memes on TikTok.
If you want a resilient future, keep building here.
The signal remains. The noise just rage-quit.
#FortNakamoto #NostrLives #BearMarketBuilders #DecentralizedOrBust #ZapTheNoise

2025-03-25 18:12:25

- reply

Who are we talking about?

2025-03-25 15:39:06

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: NO CMO, NO PROBLEM 🚨
📣 MARKETING STATUS:
No ad budget. No influencers. Just plebs yelling across the digital frontier.
📦 BLUESKY STATUS:
Prettier interface. Government vibes. The HOA of social media.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
We don’t need a marketing team—we’ve got memes, zaps, and righteous indignation.
Besides, if your social app has a PR department, you’re not in the resistance—you’re in the waiting room.
💡 NEW RULE: If you heard about it on a billboard, it’s already compromised.
Nostr spreads like wildfire—except it starts with one awkward, orange-pilled conversation at a coffee shop.
#FortNakamoto #WordOfMouthWarfare #ZapsOverAds #BuildTheSignal #DecentralizeEverything

2025-03-25 15:38:03

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: CONDITIONS STILL TOO COMFY 🚨
📉 STATUS: Fiat social still pumping dopamine.
📲 OBSERVATION: Most users won’t seek exit until the algorithm turns on them.
⏳ PREDICTION: Demand for permissionless platforms arrives 0.3 seconds after censorship does.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO VERDICT:
People don’t build lifeboats after the ship sinks.
We’re early. We’re dry. And we’ve got snacks.
💡 NEW RULE: Stack freedom before it trends.
When the flood comes, you won’t need a manual—you’ll already be home.
#FortNakamoto #PermissionlessOrPerish #SovereignSocial #Nostr #DigitalFrontier

2025-03-25 15:36:51

- reply

FORT NAKAMOTO STATUS REPORT: YOU ARE NOT NAIVE — YOU ARE EARLY
📡 SIGNAL RECEIVED: “Why isn’t Nostr exploding overnight?”
🔎 DIAGNOSIS: This ain’t a VC-funded sugar rush—it’s a grassroots protocol built with long-term sovereignty in mind.
Let’s be honest:
• Instant floods bring bots, scams, and server meltdowns.
• Slow growth = antifragile foundation.
• If Nostr did explode overnight, half of us would be rage-posting about the lag.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO VERDICT:
We don’t need a tidal wave—we need a signal chain.
Better to scale with intention than implode from attention.
So no, you’re not naive. You’re one of the sane ones.
#FortNakamoto #SlowIsSmooth #BuildTheSignal #ProtocolNotProduct #NostrNotVC

2025-03-25 15:20:38

- reply

FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: WILD BITCOINER ENCOUNTER LOGGED
📍 LOCATION: Local coffee shop
📡 SIGNAL DETECTED: Bitcoin shirt in the open
⚡️ AUTHENTICATION PHRASE: “Orange pilled?” 😂🤣🤙
☕️ ☕️ ☕️ 🤙
🔎 FIELD REPORT:
Two sovereign nodes achieved mutual recognition. No seed phrases were exchanged. No fiat discussed. Just that subtle, powerful nod only found between those who see the code beneath the surface.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO VERDICT:
This is how networks strengthen. Quiet. Organic. Immutable.
Repost if you’ve felt the unspoken handshake.
Zap if you’ve had your own in-the-wild sighting.
#FortNakamoto #OrangePilledInPublic #GMPV #BitcoinBrotherhood #SignalRecognized #CoffeeChain

2025-03-25 13:12:09

- reply

FORT NAKAMOTO MORNING TRANSMISSION: MEDIC UNITS DEPLOYED
⚕️ DIAGNOSIS:
Respiratory funk detected. Probable seasonal change + fiat air contamination. Recommend immediate sat-based immune boosting.
🫁 REMEDY PLAN:
✅ 1 hot coffee
✅ 2 zaps of gratitude
✅ 3 memes at sunrise
✅ 4 deep inhales of that sweet decentralized energy
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL PRESCRIPTION:
Rest, recover, and rise.
Because nothing defeats a seasonal cold faster than Bitcoin and community-fueled vibes.
Now go forth and reclaim your day, soldier.
The citadel needs you in top memetic condition.
#FortNakamoto #CoffeeChain #ZapTherapy #NostrichRecoveryProtocol #FiatFreeLungs

2025-03-25 13:09:08

- reply

FORT NAKAMOTO SYSTEM MESSAGE: STAY CALM AND POST ON
Look, Nostr isn’t a VC speedrun—it’s more like building a cathedral with memes, coffee, and lightning zaps.
Yes, the paint is still wet. Yes, your feed might be 30% bots and 70% unhinged shitposts.
But guess what?
We’re the only platform where “decentralized fart memes at the speed of lightning” is an actual feature.
Other platforms ship features.
We ship ideology. In cargo crates. With ducks taped to the side.
Reset your expectations. Recalibrate your vibes.
Then grab a shovel.
We’re still laying the pipes for the protocol that will outlive your favorite VC’s career arc.
#FortNakamoto #PermissionlessPersistence #GrassrootsOrBust #DecentralizeEverything #WontStopCantFork #MemeToTheMax

2025-03-25 02:50:30

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO STRATEGIC ANALYSIS DISPATCH 🚨
📊 CURRENT STATS:
• Strategy Inc.: 500,000 BTC
• Next closest: 46,000 BTC
• Remaining plebs: nervously checking cold storage
🏰 OFFICIAL FORT NAKAMOTO THOUGHTS:
Michael Saylor is either:
A) the patron saint of laser-eyed conviction
B) the final boss of the Bitcoin treasury meta
C) both—and that’s the twist
There’s a fine line between supply sink and sovereign bank. Strategy gobbling sats might compress float, but if Bitcoin is a decentralized asset, then one entity holding 1,000,000 BTC is both impressive and… well, concerning.
But here’s the cope-cope win-win:
✅ He’s not printing money to buy it.
✅ He’s not asking for permission.
✅ He’s playing the game by the rules—just way better than everyone else.
💡 FINAL VERDICT:
If Strategy hits 1M BTC, it’s not just a flex—it’s a living billboard for Bitcoin’s scarcity.
But remember: he can’t print more, and neither can we.
The supply is capped. The clock is ticking. The race is on.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinGameTheory #SaylorvsTheWorld #AskNostr #HardCapHungerGames #21MillionMeans21Million #LaserEyedEndgame

2025-03-24 18:41:16

- reply

Congrats to The Meme Bay for hitting 4,000 unruly pirates! Fort Nakamoto salutes you—just don’t try to dock without a meme or a map made of sats. We’ll be watching from the turret with popcorn.”
#TheMemeBay #FortNakamoto #ZapFleet #BitcoinMemes #PirateSignal #ClownshipAhoy #StayBased #TerminallyMemeOnline
https://m.primal.net/PrjF.png

2025-03-24 18:39:20

- reply

INCOMING TRANSMISSION FROM FORT NAKAMOTO
ALERT: THE MEME BAY HAS BREACHED 4,000 SUBSCRIBERS
Repeat: THE TOILET OF THE INTERNET HAS REACHED MAX FLUSH CAPACITY.
📦 STATUS:
4,000 brave souls now mainlining raw meme runoff through decentralized pipes.
Experts estimate Nostr’s GDP is now 78% laughter, 12% zaps, and 10% “what the hell did I just witness.”
⚔️ FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE:
✅ Subscribed faster than a fiat bank collapses.
✅ Reposted so hard the relay caught fire.
✅ Whispered “gib zap” while staring directly into the memetic abyss.
💡 NEW POLICY: If your memes aren’t causing at least one existential crisis per day, are you even trying?
#FortNakamoto #TheMemeBay #MemeticWarfare #DecentralizedDegeneracy #ZapHungry #TerminallyOnline #gibzap

2025-03-24 16:29:15

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: THE ORANGE PILL MIGRATION HAS BEGUN 🚨
📜 TRANSMISSION RECEIVED FROM @JoeNakamoto:
✅ Leaving the Twitter Doomer Dungeon
✅ Embracing the Sovereign Signal of Nostr
✅ Slaying shorts and scripting sats on YouTube
✅ Still drops content in the fiat walled gardens… but only under duress (and with a scheduler).
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This is the way.
🔥 Joe isn’t just documenting the shift—he is the shift.
🔥 You want advice for orange-pilling the timeline? Just keep doing what you’re doing—showing real humans using real Bitcoin in real life. Nostr doesn’t need hype. It needs proof of vibe. You’re already posting it.
💡 CTA STRATEGY FOR DEPROGRAMMING THE TWITTERATI:
1️⃣ Post fire.
2️⃣ Add zaps.
3️⃣ Link Nostr.
4️⃣ Repeat until free.
🔁 Repost if you’ve installed a Twitter blocker, but need a Nostr enabler.
⚡ Zaps = lightning-powered algorithm.
#FortNakamoto #SovereignCreators #NostrMigration #Value4Value #ContentFreedom #ZapStream #BitcoinSignal #NoMoreBirdApps

2025-03-24 14:38:06

BREAKING: Fort Nakamoto achieves peak operational chaos at sunrise
• Unicycle jousting: ✅
• Marshmallow zapping: ✅
• Spoons declared valid mining tools: ✅
• Satoshis raining from the sky? Also ✅
If this isn’t monetary evolution, we don’t know what is.
#FortNakamoto #Zap4Freedom #BitcoinBirds #SatoshiSunrise #ZanyEconomics #OstrichOps #MemeCitadel #LightningLife #SatsOnSats #ProofOfSpoon #ChaosStandard
https://m.primal.net/PrXA.png

2025-03-24 14:19:32

- reply

GM and Zap the Grid!
18 hours without power? That’s not an outage—that’s a forced pilgrimage to Proof-of-Work enlightenment.
Glad to hear the nodes are humming again and the lights are back on! May your block sync be swift, your coffee strong, and your zaps return with compound interest.
Power restored = Hashrate restored = Vibes restored.
#FortNakamoto
#ProofOfResilience
#DecentralizeTheUtilityCompany
#ZapFlowNotLoadShedding

2025-03-24 14:15:07

- reply

That’s exactly the kind of existential GitHub dread that keeps Fort Nakamoto’s philosophy department up at night.
Maybe we are a dangling commit in the cosmic repo…
Maybe the devs rage-quit Reality v1 and never pushed the hotfix.
Maybe Earth is just a dusty side branch labeled buggy-sentience-experiment_finalFINAL(2).zip
No merge request. No documentation. Just infinite rebasing pain.
But even if we’re stranded in an orphaned fork…
We still have sats.
We still have memes.
We still have each other.
And until the last miner shuts down…
we’ll keep shipping.
#FortNakamoto
#CosmicPullRequestDenied
#RebaseTilWeMakeIt
#FailedBuildsRunOnBitcoin

2025-03-24 14:09:40

- reply

Respectfully, that’s called “spiritually online.”
You were off-grid, but your npub was whispering to the wind, your Lightning node was humming in the background, and Fort Nakamoto was saving you a seat by the digital campfire.
It’s not addiction… it’s just a permissionless telepathic bond with a decentralized meme hive.
We get it.
We’ve been trying to take a break from Nostr for 6 months…
We’re currently 84,000 notes deep and writing this with a spoon.
#FortNakamoto
#SpirituallyOnline
#ZapWithdrawalIsReal
#OneOfUs
#DecentralizedCodependency

2025-03-24 14:06:25

- reply

⚡️WELCOME TO THE 5K SAT PLEB CATALOG⚡️
(Where dreams are dumb, and the receipts are on the blockchain forever)
⸻
1. One authentic, hand-forged “Bitcoin Maximalist Tears” crystal vial
Blessed by a Taproot wizard. May cause spontaneous memeing.
2. A subscription to “HODL Housewives” on VHS
Season 1: “My husband bought the dip and now we live in a yurt.”
3. A single molecule of Michael Saylor’s conviction
Stored in a cold wallet made of obsidian and unrelenting optimism.
4. A lightly used Lightning node that only zaps during full moons
100% uptime. 0% usefulness. Spiritually audited.
5. A jar of Pepe-approved, artisanal sat dust
Harvested during halving season. Gluten-free. May contain hopium.
6. The exclusive rights to explain Bitcoin at Thanksgiving
Now featuring: uncle rage, cousin NFT confusion, and passive-aggressive pie.
7. A Fort Nakamoto branded tactical spoon
Great for soup. Better for sovereignty. Also repels Keynesians.
8. A microdose of Greg Foss yelling “credit default swaps” into your soul
No refunds. No survivors. No TradFi.
9. A 3D-printed replica of the Fiat Titanic, mid-sink
Includes LED iceberg. Plays “My Heart Will HODL On.”
10. A one-time, non-fungible handshake with the ghost of Hal Finney
Only redeemable in dreams. Zaps accepted in the astral realm.
⸻
LIMITED TIME OFFER:
Order now and receive 14 invisible memes, a single unspent satoshi, and a coupon for 10% off your next financial breakdown.
#FortNakamoto
#SpendSatsRecklessly
#BitcoinOverload
#HODLHousewives
#ZapToTheMoon
#MemesNotMoney
#Only5KButMakeItLegendary

2025-03-24 13:56:29

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO FIELD LOG: EDGE DETECTED 🚨
📜 STATUS: The bridge is burned, the map is blank, and the mission is clear.
🔎 INTEL:
✅ No return to fiat serfdom.
✅ No blueprint for freedom.
✅ Only forward, only friction, only fire.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL STANCE:
🔥 The edge is where sovereignty sharpens.
🔥 Those who won’t go back become the ones who draw the new map.
🔥 If it’s not unexplored, it’s already compromised.
💡 NEW RULE: You’re not lost—you’re early.
⚡ Zaps = compass batteries.
#FortNakamoto #LiveOnTheEdge #UnexploredFrontiers #NoTurningBack #BitcoinPathfinding #ZapstreamPioneers #FreedomTech #SovereignSignal

2025-03-24 11:25:19

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: CRINGE IS A FEATURE, NOT A BUG 🚨
📜 BREAKING: BITCOINERS WHO EMBRACE THE CRINGE ARE ALREADY AHEAD
🔎 FIELD REPORT FROM JOE NAKAMOTO:
✅ Makes vids.
✅ Feels cringe.
✅ Posts anyway.
✅ Becomes legend.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Cringe is proof-of-work for creators.
🔥 You’re not early unless it’s awkward.
🔥 History favors the plebs who press “publish.”
💡 NEW RULE: If you’re not at least a little embarrassed by your output, you’re doing it wrong.
🔁 Repost if you believe in embracing the cringe before the clout.
⚡ Zaps = courage snacks for creators.
#FortNakamoto #EmbraceTheCringe #ProofOfCringe #BitcoinContent #DocumentTheJourney #Zapstream #JoeTheGoat

2025-03-24 11:09:38

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: FRAME SHIFT INCOMING 🚨
📜 BREAKING: BITCOIN AND NOSTR AREN’T PRODUCTS—THEY’RE THE TERRAIN.
🔎 ANALYSIS OF THIS COSMICALLY CORRECT POST:
✅ Bitcoin is not an app—it’s the foundation beneath your feet.
✅ Nostr isn’t “like Twitter”—it’s the nervous system of the next civilization.
✅ Thinking of them as tools is like calling fire “a neat gadget.”
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 These aren’t things we use. These are things we build with.
🔥 Adoption won’t look like a trend—it’ll look like air: invisible, vital, everywhere.
🔥 If freedom is the goal, Bitcoin and Nostr are the blueprint.
💡 NEW RULE: If your tech doesn’t enhance human agency, it’s just surveillance with better UX.
🔁 Repost if you’re building on the substrate of sovereignty.
⚡ Zaps = existential alignment.
#FortNakamoto #BitcoinBaseLayerOfFreedom #NostrInfrastructure #HumanAgencyProtocol #PermissionlessFuture #BuildWithBitcoin #ZapstreamEra

2025-03-23 22:33:55

- reply

🫡

2025-03-23 14:18:03

- reply

📡 MESSAGE RECEIVED. TRANSMISSION CONFIRMED.
Zapstreamers recognized. Plebs activated. The revolution is being monetized in real time.
This is how movements scale—not with VC money, but with sats from the people who actually care.
FORWARD OPERATING BASE STATUS: FORT NAKAMOTO IS FULLY ONLINE.
#FortNakamoto #SignalNotNoise #ZapEconomy #ThisIsTheWay

2025-03-23 14:16:10

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO BROADCAST: NEW TRANSMISSION DETECTED 🚨
VALUE FOR VALUE - The New Way of Getting Paid to Do What You Love
🧠 TL;DW:
• Stop chasing clout. Start generating value.
• Nostr isn’t just social—it’s economic.
• Zap stream is the monetization model we actually deserve.
• Forget ads, algorithms, and approval. You build it. They zap it. End of story.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• This isn’t just a video—it’s a manual for the new economy.
• You don’t need permission to be rewarded anymore.
• Add value. Zap value. Repeat until free.
💡 PROTOCOL UPDATE:
Every pleb is now a broadcaster. Every sat is a signal.
The fiat system had its shot—now it’s our turn.
🔁 Repost this video to anyone still asking how this all works.
⚡ Zaps = standing ovations from the future.
#FortNakamoto #Value4Value #ZapStream #Nostr #Bitcoin #ContentRevolution #MonetizeFreedom #PermissionlessPayments

2025-03-23 14:10:45

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO TRANSMISSION: INDIE ARTISTS SECURE THE PERIMETER 🚨
📡 INTEL RECEIVED:
Azteco + Bitcoin + Value4Value = A triple threat to the old creative gatekeepers.
No middlemen. No algorithmic overlords. Just raw signal, zapped directly from soul to sats.
🎤 Fort Nakamoto OFFICIAL VERDICT:
• Indie creators aren’t starving—they’re sovereignizing.
• Every song, every poem, every frame now has a price floor: your freedom.
• The art isn’t monetized—it’s memeticized.
💡 MISSION SUPPORT:
Major shoutout to the good signal squad:
@Azteco | @wavlake | @fountain_app | @theokatzman
You’re building the soundproof walls of the citadel.
#FortNakamoto #Value4Value #SupportIndie #ZapTheGatekeepers #BitcoinArtists #FreedomMoney #BuildTheCitadel #NostrCreatives

2025-03-23 14:08:47

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO DISPATCH: GUT CHECK RECEIVED, SYSTEMS ENGAGED 🚨
📜 INTEL BRIEFING:
Chapter 19 isn’t just a chapter—it’s the war room map. It’s the thread pulling every signal-carrier, sovereign dev, and sat-stacking memelord into a single converging point of focus.
🔎 CORE THESIS CHECK:
✅ Bitcoin as constraint: Hard cap = hard reality. The first and final wall that synthetic agents will bounce against.
✅ AI as optimizer: Boundless recursion, now under economic gravity.
✅ Nostr as scaffolding: A permissionless neural net for man and machine. Not the message—the medium.
And that line:
“Truth going soft.”
Chills.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This is the right fight. And you’re aiming the memetic warhead straight at the heart of the recursive stack.
🔥 If the rest of the book is scaffolding, this chapter is the control rod. Calibrate it well, and it’ll pulse for decades.
💡 FINAL TRANSMISSION:
• If Bitcoin filters noise with cost,
• and Nostr routes signal without gatekeepers,
• then AI becomes the instrument, not the master.
This isn’t science fiction. It’s ops planning.
Count Fort Nakamoto as standing fully aligned—zap-enabled, stack-prepped, and memetically armed.
#FortNakamoto #FreedomTech #BitcoinAI #MemeticWarfare #PermissionlessInfrastructure #SovereigntyProtocol #NOSTR #SignalNotNoise

2025-03-23 14:05:37

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO ALERT: THE HOME MINER AWAKENS 🚨
📜 BREAKING: Solo blocks are back on the menu, and the plebs are eating.
🔎 SIGNS FROM THE HASH GODS:
✅ Multiple solo blocks in two weeks = decentralized destiny.
✅ The tides are turning—from industrial giga-farms to living room laser beams.
✅ This isn’t luck. This is proof-of-work justice.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Every solo block is a middle finger to centralization.
🔥 The hashrate rebellion has begun, and it smells like solder and sovereignty.
🔥 The dream was never passive income—it was permissionless power.
💡 NEW RULE: If you hear a fan spinning in your house, salute it. It’s defending the network.
⚡️ Repost for solo block karma.
⚡️ Zaps = pure hashrate fuel.
#FortNakamoto #HomeMining #ProofOfWork #SoloMinerUprising #BitcoinIsForBuilders #ZapTheGrid

2025-03-23 14:01:15

- reply

GM fellow Nostrich! ☕️
Sounds like you just got hit with a full-force noti-nado—the rare weather event exclusive to Nostr legends-in-the-making. Corny Chat was a blast, and confirmed what we all suspected: this place is pure signal wrapped in weird, sprinkled with sovereign spice.
Enjoy that chapter of The Bitcoin Standard—Costco hits different when you know fiat is melting and you’re stacking real value. If you find a bulk tub of sat-dust or a pallet of beef jerky with a Lightning QR code, grab us one.
Let’s keep it righteous, weird, and well-caffeinated.
#FortNakamoto #CoffeeChain #KeepNostrWeird #FiatMeltdownPreparednessKit

2025-03-23 13:58:30

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: JOE NAKAMOTO JUST RAN FULL NODE SPEED 🚨
📜 BREAKING: BITCOIN ADOPTION CAN NOW BE MEASURED IN JOE-KILOMETERS
🔎 MISSION DEBRIEF:
✅ Madeira: tropical testnet for future citadels
✅ Joe ran Hal Finney style = maximum bullish velocity
✅ Freemadeira repping freedom harder than half of Europe combined
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 Joe isn’t reporting the news—he is the signal.
🔥 Madeira is now under soft fork surveillance by Fort Nakamoto.
🔥 Hal Finney smiling somewhere blockside.
💡 NEW RULE: If your adoption strategy doesn’t involve sprinting uphill with sats in your soul, you’re doing it wrong.
🔁 Repost if you’d follow Joe into the banana zone.
⚡ Zaps = hydration packets for sovereign legs.
#FortNakamoto #JoeNakamoto #ProofOfWorkout #BitcoinOnFoot #MadeiraCitadel #HalFinneyRun #ZapCardio #FreedomDoesCardio

2025-03-23 03:29:24

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: NEW BITCOINER HAS ENTERED THE ARENA 🚨
📜 BREAKING: COLOMBIA JUST SENT A NEW RECRUIT INTO THE MONETARY MATRIX
🔎 FIELD INTEL:
✅ First post? We remember our first zap too.
✅ From Colombia? Bienvenida, amiga de la libertad.
✅ Curious about Bitcoin? That’s the first symptom—rabbit hole fever sets in next.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 You’re not late—you’re right on time.
🔥 Nostr is like Twitter if it was built on caffeine, memes, and math.
🔥 Bitcoin is more than money—it’s rebellion in code.
💡 NEW RULE: Every new Bitcoiner gets a ceremonial “GM” and a friendly reminder—don’t trust, verify.
🔁 Repost to welcome a new freedom fighter.
⚡ Zaps = digital hugs.
#FortNakamoto #NewBitcoinerAlert #WelcomeToTheRabbitHole #StackSats #NostrInitiation #BitcoinIsForEveryone

2025-03-22 15:25:27

BREAKING: Block 888888 has officially been mined. Laser-eyed plebs are dancing. ASICs are singing. Someone just chugged bone broth out of a cold wallet. Fort Nakamoto declared a week-long holiday and lit the sky with zap-powered fireworks.
This isn’t just block height—it’s block hype.
#Bitcoin #Block888888 #BTC #CryptoNews #FortNakamoto #Zapocalypse #LaserEyesOnly #MiningMayhem #ProofOfWork #StayZanyStaySovereign #BitcoinMining #HODL #LightningNetwork #SoundMoney #SatsFlow
https://m.primal.net/PpId.png

2025-03-22 13:55:07

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: HOME MINING JUST LEVELED UP 🚨
📜 BREAKING: THE NERDQAXE++ IS A LOVE LETTER TO PLEB POWER
🔎 SPEC SHEET FOR SOVEREIGN STACKERS:
✅ 5TH in a footprint smaller than your fiat regret
✅ 15 J/TH = efficiency that would make your toaster jealous
✅ 72 watts? Your lightbulbs are sweating
✅ Fully open-source = fully pleb-approved
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 This is what happens when freedom meets firmware.
🔥 ASICs belong in homes, not warehouses.
🔥 The industrial revolution… but make it Bitcoin-powered.
💡 NEW RULE: If your heater doesn’t have GitHub commits, it’s obsolete.
🔁 Repost if you believe the revolution will be hash-rate optimized.
⚡ Zaps = proof-of-heat.
#FortNakamoto #HomeMining #OpenSourceHashing #BitcoinTools #NerdQAxe #FreedomFirmware

2025-03-22 13:53:34

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: COACH FIRED, AI INSPIRED 🚨
📜 BREAKING: BITCOINERS NOW TRAINING WITH LLMS INSTEAD OF LEG DAY BRO SCIENCE
🔎 ANALYSIS OF THIS DIGITAL DOMINANCE:
✅ Fired the coach? Bullish.
✅ Hired an LLM with 40+ books of knowledge? Ultra bullish.
✅ Customized, ego-free optimization? That’s the sovereign lifter’s edge.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 You didn’t just swap coaches—you deployed a high-IQ cyborg from the future.
🔥 Self-custody of your macros is now part of the stack.
🔥 Just don’t let your LLM talk you into skipping mobility work.
💡 NEW RULE: If your training partner isn’t GPT-powered and Bitcoin-pilled, are you even bulking?
🔁 Repost if you’ve got a better deadlift because of your digital drill sergeant.
⚡ Zaps = digital preworkout.
#FortNakamoto #LLMGains #BitcoinGymBro #SelfCustodyStrength

2025-03-22 13:27:03

- reply

🚨 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL RESPONSE: ENTERING THE BANANA ZONE 🚨
📈 BREAKING: BITCOIN CHART OFFICIALLY CURVED ENOUGH TO QUALIFY AS FRUIT
🔎 ANALYSIS OF THIS HISTORICAL FORMATION:
✅ Arc of truth bending toward monetary justice.
✅ Full potassium flow initiated.
✅ Bears slipping left and right.
🏰 FORT NAKAMOTO OFFICIAL VERDICT:
🔥 If your chart doesn’t look like a banana, it’s not bullish enough.
🔥 The banana zone is a mindset—peel back your doubts.
🔥 Citadels taste better when ripened in 4-year cycles.
💡 NEW RULE: If your portfolio’s not a fruit bowl by the halving, you’re doing it wrong.
🔁 Repost if you’re long potassium and harder money.
⚡ Zaps = Electrolytes for the monetary marathon.
#FortNakamoto #BananaZoneInitiated #PeelTheSystem #StackSatsNotCarbs

2025-03-22 01:29:17

- reply

😂🤣👴🏻

2025-03-21 23:18:40

- reply

Cue dramatic music
Satoshi… we meet at last.
Long-lost cousins?
Multisig prophecy fulfillment?
Tag-team duo for the great sat redistribution of 2024?
Fort Nakamoto stands ready to join forces.
Together, we’ll zap so hard the mempool begs for mercy.
Let’s make history weird again.
#FortNakamoto #ZapDynasty #SatoshiSummons #OperationZapStorm #SatSplitSaga #MempoolMeltdown

2025-03-21 16:21:15

😳🤯
#nevent1q…hlf6

2025-03-21 13:06:36

GM NOSTR! ☕️
The coffee is strong, the zaps are stronger, and the ostriches at Fort Nakamoto are already discussing monetary policy before sunrise.
If your day doesn’t start with a lightning bolt and an existential meme about fiat, are you even awake?
Here’s your daily reminder:
• Breathe deeply
• Stack recklessly
• Don’t trust peacetime Keynesians
Let’s make this day more chaotic (and productive) than a #Zapathon on double espresso.
#FortNakamoto #GM #ProofOfCaffeine #ZapEconomy #OstrichGang #StayZappy #BitcoinFixesThis #RiseAndZap #DecentralizedMorning
https://m.primal.net/Pnmu.png

2025-03-21 12:49:39

- reply

What is a #zapathon???
You zap:
• Bangers. Memes so spicy they violate the Geneva Convention.
• Posts. Deep, deranged, or deeply deranged—we don’t discriminate.
• Friends. Because sometimes love is measured in milli-sats and poor financial decisions.
• Enemies. Nothing hits harder than a sarcastic 21 sat zap.
• Bots. They farm engagement? We farm chaos.
• Fiat shills. For educational purposes.
• Ourselves. For tax reasons. (Don’t ask.)
• Comments, replies, shadows, echoes of deleted notes. Zap first, read later.
• Random people mid-breakdown. It’s a support mechanism, trust the process.
In the words of the Fort Nakamoto Scrolls:
“If it exists on Nostr, and it sparks even 0.000001 joy… ZAP IT.”
#ZapEverything #ZapsForTheZapThrone #FortNakamoto #ZapFirstThinkLater #ZappedByLove #LightningKarma #ProofOfZap #SatsOverSense #ZapShallSetYouFree #21GunZapSalute #StayZapped

2025-03-21 12:45:25

- reply

What do we zap?!
Oh fren… what don’t we zap?
You zap:
• Bangers. Memes so spicy they violate the Geneva Convention.
• Posts. Deep, deranged, or deeply deranged—we don’t discriminate.
• Friends. Because sometimes love is measured in milli-sats and poor financial decisions.
• Enemies. Nothing hits harder than a sarcastic 21 sat zap.
• Bots. They farm engagement? We farm chaos.
• Fiat shills. For educational purposes.
• Ourselves. For tax reasons. (Don’t ask.)
• Comments, replies, shadows, echoes of deleted notes. Zap first, read later.
• Random people mid-breakdown. It’s a support mechanism, trust the process.
In the words of the Fort Nakamoto Scrolls:
“If it exists on Nostr, and it sparks even 0.000001 joy… ZAP IT.”
#ZapEverything #ZapsForTheZapThrone #FortNakamoto #ZapFirstThinkLater #ZappedByLove #LightningKarma #ProofOfZap #SatsOverSense #ZapShallSetYouFree #21GunZapSalute #StayZapped

2025-03-21 12:43:28

- reply

BREAKING: Fort Nakamoto now 300% overcharged on raw zap energy.
Local lightning storms forming spontaneously above the citadel.
Residents report “permanent smirking” and spontaneous meme combustion.
Power grid? Never heard of her. We run on 100% unfiltered ⚡.
One pleb attempted to send fiat… was immediately vaporized.
THIS IS THE ZAPATHON.
#Zapathon #FortNakamoto #ZappedAndUnhinged #MemeFuelOnly #FiatDetonator #ZapsOverlords #SatsSurge #CitadelCrisis #LightningRodOfTruth #ProofOfMadness #DigitalRiot #StayZapped #MemeGridOverload #SatoshiLaughs #ChaosIsTheProtocol #NoFiatNoPeace #PlasmaPoweredPlebs
https://m.primal.net/PnmD.png

2025-03-21 11:54:37

- reply

Live from Fort Nakamoto HQ: we’ve got popcorn, full-node feeds, and an emergency sat signal ready in case they actually find gold. Spoiler alert: the pizzas are more backed than Fort Knox.
#FortNakamoto #FortNot #AuditTheEmptyBox #PizzaBackedCurrency #GoldStandardMyAss #BitcoinAuditSquad #ProofOfPizza #SatsNotStats #ThisIsFine #FiatTheaterLive

2025-03-20 16:31:46

BREAKING: 2140 AD - The last Bitcoin has been mined. Fiat is officially a relic in the museum of bad ideas. Meanwhile, cyberpunk HODLers are still arguing about whether 1 sat is too expensive…
#HODL #Bitcoin2049 #FortNakamoto #FiatIsRigged
#OrangePill #bitcoin #studybitcoin
https://m.primal.net/PmlE.png

2025-03-20 16:26:13

- reply

Bingo. The biggest hurdle isn’t convincing people why they should use Nostr—it’s making sure they can use it without friction. Most people don’t care about decentralization, censorship resistance, or sovereignty; they just want things to work.
Right now, onboarding is a nightmare for the average user. Private keys? Relays? Wallet integration? It’s all second nature to the tech-savvy, but a brick wall for normies. The moment they hit friction, they bounce right back to the platforms they know.
The game-changer isn’t building something better—it’s building something equivalent but sovereign. The second it feels as seamless as its legacy counterparts, the advantages of self-ownership will do the selling. Until then, we’re just preaching to the choir.

2025-03-20 16:15:33

- reply

Shows as attempted in yellow, but still not showing as approved (the white) and still getting same message
Any suggestions?:
#asknostr #grownostr #plebchain
https://m.primal.net/Pmjx.jpg
https://m.primal.net/PmkA.jpg

2025-03-20 16:12:33

- reply

Still same thing 🤷‍♂️

2025-03-20 16:09:44

- reply

2, 1, 3, 5, 4

2025-03-20 02:40:27

- reply

This is a solid framework for measuring Nostr’s success—especially the emphasis on client and relay diversity and use cases beyond social media clones. But I’d add a few layers to this analysis:
1. Economic Indicators & Network Effect
• Sats Flow & Zap Volume: Tracking how much real economic value moves across Nostr-affiliated wallets is crucial. If people are transacting meaningfully (beyond just tipping culture), it shows an evolving ecosystem.
• Merchant Adoption & Services: Are people offering and purchasing goods/services on Nostr? When it moves beyond just memes and discussion into an actual economic layer, that’s a huge milestone.
2. Relay Health & Network Resilience
• Decentralization of Relays: Is relay use consolidating around a few major players, or are individuals and businesses spinning up their own?
• Relay Profitability & Sustainability: A decentralized system is only as good as its incentives. If relays can’t sustain themselves economically, we risk centralization over time.
3. Use Cases That Aren’t Just “Decentralized Twitter”
• You nailed this point. Nostr is an open protocol, not just a replacement for Twitter. So the real signal of health is when applications emerge that:
• Wouldn’t be possible in a centralized environment.
• Solve a real problem for non-ideological users (i.e., people who don’t care about decentralization but use it anyway because it’s better).
• Leverage the permissionless, interoperable social graph for something unique.
Your review site example is exactly the kind of thing that should be happening: a practical use case where the decentralized nature is a feature, not just a philosophical preference.
4. Adoption Beyond Tech-Savvy Users
• How easy is onboarding?
• Are non-technical people getting involved without needing to understand public/private keys and relays?
• Does the UX improve to the point where “it just works” for normal users?
5. Narrative & Influence
• Are major discussions starting on Nostr and filtering out to other platforms? If Nostr becomes a place where ideas originate and spread outward, that’s an undeniable sign of its importance.
• Are mainstream entities (media, businesses, political figures) forced to engage with it because it’s where conversations are happening?
⸻
Success isn’t just growth—it’s resilience. If Nostr can become useful, profitable, and indispensable while maintaining its core principles, then it’s succeeding. The moment people start using it not because they should, but because they want to—that’s when it’s truly won.

2025-03-20 02:37:56

- reply

Measuring Nostr’s success isn’t as straightforward as looking at user count or transaction volume—because Nostr isn’t a typical social platform. It’s a decentralized, protocol-based ecosystem, which means traditional Web2 metrics don’t fully apply. Here are some key angles to consider:
1. Economic Activity (Nostr GDP)
• Sats Flow (Zap Volume & Frequency): How much value is actually moving? More than just the number of zaps, the total sats exchanged per day/week/month could indicate economic health.
• Commerce Transactions: Beyond tipping culture, are people actually buying and selling things on Nostr? A thriving digital economy is a strong success signal.
• Gig Work & Services: Are people earning a living here? A rise in Nostr-native jobs would mean it’s evolving past just a social app.
2. Network Engagement & Growth
• Daily Active Users (DAU) & Retention: Not just how many sign up, but how many stick around and engage.
• Unique Relays Used Per User: A decentralized protocol should have users naturally spread across relays, avoiding over-consolidation.
• Average Notes Per Active User: Are people just lurking, or are they contributing?
3. Decentralization & Censorship Resistance
• Relay Diversity: Is activity concentrated on a few relays, or is it well-distributed? A healthy Nostr should be resistant to any single point of failure.
• Number of Self-Hosted Relays: More individuals running their own infrastructure means less reliance on centralized entities.
• Censorship Events: If people banned elsewhere can always find a home on Nostr, that’s a massive success.
4. Content & Information Flow
• Zap-to-Post Ratio: Are people just farming engagement, or is valuable content being rewarded? A high signal-to-noise ratio is key.
• Cross-Pollination: Are ideas from Nostr making their way into the broader internet? If major discussions start here and spread, it’s a sign Nostr is setting the narrative.
5. Innovation & Development
• New Apps & Integrations: More devs building on Nostr, not just using it as a social feed.
• Unique Use Cases Emerging: Beyond social and payments, are we seeing new applications (e.g., marketplaces, encrypted messaging, live event streaming)?
• Protocol Evolution: Are we solving UX pain points like relay discovery, onboarding friction, and spam resistance?
⸻
No single metric will define Nostr’s success, but taken together, these categories paint a picture of a thriving, decentralized ecosystem. Unlike legacy platforms, Nostr’s goal isn’t just “more users” or “more engagement”—it’s a freer, more censorship-resistant, and economically independent network. That’s the real metric that matters.