Wallflower🌺

Living in Ohioduhtucky, south of Hell is Real.
Boy Mom, Dog Mom, Music, Nature, Politics, Blue Voter.
INTJ, Big I, Lots of N.
Allergic to everything, Gluten Free.
🎶🐾🌺🥗🌻🐾🎶🌊💜
Perhaps persnickety.
Self-critical.
Too attached until I'm detached.
Often misunderstood.🤷‍♀️
Expert in self-sabotage.🏆
Mental Health Destroyer.🗡
Seeking: Your patience.
Everything is fine.🔥

Public Key

npub1gzw2ada5kazc6ulz7lwt64dru28rckhd3d0mzmjpzswlxmqej7lsh3dkg4

NIP-05 Address

Waitnwallflower_at_beige.party@mostr.pub

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsyp89wk76tw3vdw0300h9a2k379r3uttkckha3deq3g80ndsve00cpz4mhxue69uhhyetvv9ujumt0wd68ytnsw43qnj0pzr

Publishing to

relay.mostr.pub

Author Public Key

npub1gzw2ada5kazc6ulz7lwt64dru28rckhd3d0mzmjpzswlxmqej7lsh3dkg4

Show more details

Last Notes

2024-08-11 18:49:53

Once again proving to myself that I'd make a shit witness....
I've wondered (only periodically in passing the logo) why The Salty Dog Cafe has used a mountain, river, and tree as its brand image until today and now I'm like maybe I need to re-evaluate things <motions around>...
😂 what is wrong with my vision 😜
I bet some psychologist would have a field day giving me a Rorschach test.
I need to remember, context clues are my friend.😂

2024-08-09 19:11:02

Walking in the woods.
Decided I will have coffee and cake when I get back home.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/933/639/518/312/200/original/682cba719be01ed5.jpg

2024-08-08 00:09:12

My hydrangea flowers are starting to fade away.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/923/477/670/410/558/original/2231f75ef58b5a6e.jpg

2024-08-07 09:02:23

Only slept about 2.5 hours last night...gonna be a day.
Make it a good one.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/919/916/980/401/463/original/533128ec3a52f8ca.jpg

2024-08-03 22:16:04

Red and yellow Arizona blanket flower with a bumblebee
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/900/395/011/194/293/original/c086744e0a0e312f.jpg

2024-07-31 22:59:23

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@npub16xr…qzyf thank you! I'm fighting some kind of black spot on it, or something, but it's blooming like it can't be stopped!💜

2024-07-31 22:19:35

My young climbing rose is putting on a show
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/883/416/024/017/883/original/d9cc47af55debd06.jpg
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/883/416/103/006/760/original/8286d5e5fe259f88.jpg

2024-07-27 13:11:48

Once they get going they are pretty and hold up well in full sun.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/858/612/172/189/539/original/535b62d610b9044a.jpg

2024-07-15 00:28:20

Had to turn the news off again.
Man who stoked political violence for years didn't expect he'd be the one shot at.
I hope Americans care enough about our democracy to unite this November, denounce trump and trump Republicans once again.
#USPol

2024-07-05 20:26:45

My favorite tree 🌳
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/735/746/222/773/885/original/c003da4a08e669f6.jpg

2024-06-29 17:40:49

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@npub1sfl…gczt hope you feel better soon

2024-05-24 11:14:22

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@npub1xsy…cevg
This is a great superpower to have. You're lucky!

2024-05-24 10:42:12

I slept 10 hours.
Solid.
I didn't even get up to pee.
I don't feel the looming threat of ripping anyone's head off this morning.
You probably are all safe today. (FAFO)
Apologies if you are missing any body parts from this past week.
Happy Friday.🌺

2024-05-23 00:53:23

Haven't been able to catch the lightning, but here is the sky in remarkable pink and purple during a storm in Ohioduhtucky
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/487/663/455/428/733/original/a1f864e1478f1df4.jpg

2024-04-07 23:03:34

Hmm.
My neighbor just invited me for drinks at 2pm tomorrow.
Hmm.
🤔
Hmm.
My republican neighbor.

2024-03-29 11:49:55

#FootpathFriday
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/112/178/817/905/178/550/original/e53cd98b18e9f3e4.jpg

2024-03-18 16:09:20

Per NYT:
"trump Spurned by 30 Companies as He Seeks Bond in $454 Million Judgment
Donald Trump’s lawyers said in a court filing that he faces “insurmountable difficulties” as he tries to raise cash for the civil fraud penalty in New York."
But I thought he was a billionaire???
#USPol

2024-02-08 09:17:24

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@npub1kef…jkqy
This is so beautiful but I'm so happy I've never seen this in real life ❄️🥶

2024-01-26 01:13:52

Libertarian man just invited me to dinner at his neighborhood clubhouse tomorrow.
I have a clubhouse in my neighborhood. It doesn't have a full-time chef or a stocked bar.
I feel so uncomfortable.
Can I wear my Adidas? What am I supposed to wear? Do I own it? Am I willing to wear it? 🤔
It really isn't because he is doing anything to make me uncomfortable (except for the invite to Floriduh)... I mean, I guess, this is his world and he keeps trying to invite me in and I keep freaking out!
#OMG
#ReasonsIAmSingle
#DontKnowWhatImDoing
#AwkwardAF
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/819/567/296/137/394/original/86c3476f17746e04.mp4

2024-01-15 21:56:58

Does anyone ever answer yes on the doctor's forms for "Do you currently or have you used illicit drugs?"
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/762/197/128/355/537/original/52662380d9301610.mp4

2024-01-09 23:14:29

#USPol
trump's legal team argued trump, as president, could kill Americans and never be charged.
Not a drill.
#HeWillKillUsAll
#VoteBlue2024
https://www.google.com/amp/s/thehill.com/regulation/court-battles/4398223-trump-team-argues-assassination-of-rivals-is-covered-by-presidential-immunity/amp/
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/728/510/911/697/706/original/d6b01849892ab9cc.jpg

2024-01-07 00:48:31

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@npub1xsy…cevg I understand

2023-12-29 23:49:38

Dude tryin to hit on me by saying he'd like to go on an "evening constitutional" with me.
Once I stopped trying to read more into that🙃😂😉, I got to reflecting...
I need to revise my profile to come across a little more "Joan Jett meets Sarah Connor" and a little less "June Cleaver meets Carol Brady"
🤦‍♀️
The many ways I'm failing here...
🤣😭🤣
#WhyIsDatingThisHard
#LoLSob

2023-12-23 00:51:49

Stupid holidays getting me up in my feels again.
For those of you that frequently interact with me, you're in my heart, you're in my soul. 💘
For those that don't interact with me too often, but often "enough" where we know each other casually and respect each other, heart beats silly like a big bass drum. 💓
For the rest of you, sugar🍬...
(Let me know if you got any of the references 😁)
Thanks to all of you for being here and not there.
Merry, merry and whatnots.
💜
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/626/989/751/480/215/original/a3503eae04187d5e.mp4

2023-12-17 21:11:25

I really want to make 2024 the first best 2020-something.
It's time.
Let's do it.
🥂

2023-12-15 12:19:03

It's true, I will. For free.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/584/389/761/313/900/original/d85ef6eddb408322.jpg

2023-12-11 00:32:20

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@npub1y7x…jrl4 wow.
I connect with that painting.
It made my eyes well up 🥺

2023-11-26 22:53:43

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@npub1y7x…jrl4 happy #fediversary

2023-11-25 22:47:27

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@npub1y7x…jrl4 so very relevant

2023-11-19 15:36:56

Should I feel concerned that there has been one or more sherriffs or firetrucks sitting at the very nearby electrical substation for the last 4 days?

2023-10-10 16:58:54

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@npub1gg8…439g agree, mostly, but adding my hot take is that Palestinians don't support Hamas but are rather also victimized by them, just differently.

2023-10-07 13:05:28

Me:
Alexa, what's my favorite song?
Alexa:
🎶
Now here you go again
You say you want your freedom
Well, who am I to keep you down?
It's only right that you should
Play the way you feel it
But listen carefully
To the sound of your loneliness
Like a heartbeat drives you mad
In the stillness of remembering what you had
And what you lost
And what you had...
🎶
https://youtu.be/Y3ywicffOj4?si=z0NrOnJWeUvFNk_T
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/193/874/112/406/409/original/4f13667dcbdf87a3.png

2023-10-03 19:40:37

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@npub1gg8…439g love the name and spooky pic

2023-10-03 08:22:44

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@npub1gg8…439g
So feel so much of this.
I always took care of my mom.
She wanted to die most of my childhood, threatening suicide, I would plead with her not to bc that meant I would be left alone, the sole focus of my father's abuse, I spent time trying to convince her to leave him. So much so, he wrote a manifesto about how he needed to "eliminate" me because I represented "strength" to her.
I eventually convinced her to leave.
But my role was sealed. I went on to always be the parent. I didn't know how to not be.
This all said, I miss my mom. A lot.
She would always allow me to vent about work and she was down for a rant about trump (all my life).

2023-10-02 22:49:48

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@npub1gg8…439g I bet it's not in the long run 🙄

2023-10-02 21:04:10

That couple probably aren't cheating spouses...
You know, the guy with the Porsche and the woman with the CRV covered in elementary school bumperstickers that meet up in the parking lot of this park every Monday late afternoon and get in the back of the CRV, running for an hour or more.
No, they probably just cannot get quality alone time at home considering all those bumperstickers....
[Geez, girl, you're wasting gas on this...]

2023-10-01 21:28:15

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@npub1gg8…439g and filtered and muted them lol
I don't fuck around😂

2023-10-01 20:26:11

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@npub1zc4…mc2z oh, I like the idea!

2023-09-29 14:20:06

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@npub18lj…80hq you mean like my 9 - 11 hour days, 5 days a week, plus my occasional weekend hours or calls while I'm on "vacation" aren't "good" for me or my moral obligation? Why does it feel so hard to draw the line or make a different choice?
Sigh 😕

2023-09-27 22:33:37

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@npub1gg8…439g 🫂 I could tell.

2023-09-27 22:27:25

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@npub1gg8…439g
💜💜💜💜

2023-09-26 00:51:22

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@npub1gg8…439g
Cute, either way 😊

2023-09-26 00:03:58

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@npub1gg8…439g look at you posing all cute🤗💜

2023-09-24 17:49:39

21 came home, dug holes and planted 4 plants for me, did his laundry cuz his washer broke in his apartment, and picked up the shrimp scampi and enchiladas that I made for him, in the process of all this he launched a pitch for me to get him *and me* the new iPhone (knowing I prefer Samsung).
I told him I'd consider upgrading his phone for his birthday, even though I remember already buying him expensive concert tickets for his birthday.
I can't wait to also have the discussion about him paying half the phone bill once he graduates and starts working.😂

2023-09-23 18:40:38

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@npub1gg8…439g
I've run into so many Jesus preachers today. I have no problem with religion, but I do not like people pushing their religion on others. Kept Baba O'Riley handy to put on. 😂
Maybe they should stop trying to save me and focus on themselves.

2023-09-22 19:02:22

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@npub1gg8…439g
I have often wanted Joan Jett hair - no lies, no jokes. I love rock and roll.
@npub1hzf…8nrj
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/110/345/936/052/823/original/0044660d9b324745.mp4

2023-09-22 17:39:34

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@npub1hzf…8nrj @npub1gg8…439g
I love Wren's hair. If I could use styling products, I'd give me some lift.
After all, I'm GenX, baby!
Isn't she adorable and even I want that dress. It will look great in my closet with the other dresses I never wear. 😂

2023-09-21 20:11:24

I appreciate those of you that clicked on that other post just to confirm I wasn't naked.
😁

2023-09-19 23:37:12

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@npub1gg8…439g well, I've got a 21yo that keeps me up on it for sure. That's nearly exclusively what he listens to.

2023-09-19 21:02:26

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@npub1gg8…439g I was just listening to Stop and Stare by One Republic but as you know, I'm all over the place on my jams...
🎶
This town is colder now, I think it's sick of us
It's time to make our move, I'm shaking off the rust
I've got my heart set on anywhere but here
I'm staring down myself, counting up the years
Steady hands just take the wheel...
🎶
My more frequent plays lately are definitely from my son's favorites...Travis Scott, Post Malone, SleazyWorld Go, and Lil Baby....what can I say...

2023-09-18 01:00:14

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@npub1gg8…439g I've like fucking said this more or less over and over.

2023-09-17 23:36:43

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@npub1gg8…439g 💯
Love it, one of my absolute favorites.

2023-09-17 22:48:31

So good
🎶
It's not the energy reeling
Nor the lines in your face
Nor the clouds on the ceiling
Nor the clouds in space
It's not the phone on the table
Nor the bed in the earth
Nor the bed in the stable
Nor your stable words
It's not the formless being
Nor the cry in the air
Nor the boy I'm seeing
🎶 #Not
https://youtu.be/UIcVwH47uxQ?si=LNg0vEnSBiAp9V1k

2023-09-17 00:15:04

My mom and me.
Maybe of similar age, not sure(?).
Miss my mom.🕯🕊
She might have caved and let herself be a victim for like 50 years, and then isolated herself, much like I chose to do in my 20s for similar reasons (and being more beast than her), but she was an amazing and under-appreciated woman.
Good night, my friends. 💜
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/077/572/504/758/061/original/b24f824fd4f34a09.jpg

2023-09-16 00:04:04

I would like to dedicate a thread to all the people that you've/I've met that deserve the big 🖕
Happy Friday, my people.
Even though beige.party has nearly 11k character limit, I feel like I could easily exceed it.
They'll never see it, so, please, have fun telling someone to eff off here. I'll light a candle here for you and will boost it to help that voodoo magic. ✨️
I feel somewhat content in that I truly believe that the ppl that have done me wrong know it *and somehow know that I'm not opposed to it eating their brain or gut*.
🤭😈
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/071/882/740/179/346/original/41f50ac6efc929ef.mp4

2023-09-15 19:45:05

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@npub1gg8…439g
If you didn't spend time liking/disliking styles and filling out your profile, I recommend doing if you do it again.
I am pretty picky and not frilly and they mostly give me stuff I like and I rarely pick.
Good luck, dear, I'm sorry it didn't hit the mark this time.
On pricing, women are screwed always, every time.

2023-09-15 18:57:01

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@npub1gg8…439g you can give feedback. I put no open back or plunging necks. I'm cold all the time, I can't do these things.

2023-09-15 13:37:18

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@npub1gg8…439g migraines suck. I used to get them. Hopefully the rest helps and he gets to enjoy some of his weekend.

2023-09-15 13:30:13

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@npub1gg8…439g hope kid feels better soon💜

2023-09-14 22:33:13

This is big for me.
I have continued to wear a top that I believed made me look fat throughout the summer. (I know I'm not objectively fat.)
*I didn't feel like I looked fat in it today.* (I'm no bigger or smaller than when I first wore it.)
Takes work.
Abuse does things.
It takes time to silence the tapes that play in our minds.
People that find patience for those that suffered abuse are the best among us.
💜✌️

2023-09-14 21:56:46

I do kinda like saying "trump is out on bail"
I cannot wait to know how much I'll like saying "trump is behind bars" or even "trump is where he should be" 😏
#USPol

2023-09-14 21:44:16

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@npub1gg8…439g 🤷‍♀️ I think some of it is our Gen. With the exception of "that chick..." I'm usually being nice/playful. If I'm saying "that chick..." there is probably a 65% chance that what comes after it will be followed by hissing and drawn claws 😼

2023-09-14 21:39:27

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@npub1gg8…439g I hardly ever use chick unless I'm like 'that chick...', referring to another

2023-09-14 21:29:37

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@npub1gg8…439g I also say dude a lot.
Bud is growing bc I call Courage that sometimes so it naturally spreads elsewhere.
Luckily my son had me stop calling him peanut when he was like 8 or there might be rumors started about me at work by this point.

2023-09-14 21:22:04

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@npub1gg8…439g I say you guys and y'all lol 😆

2023-09-13 20:37:48

I think the outside is trying to kill me 🤧😢🥺🤧
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/059/758/787/187/292/original/11ee950e361c1688.mp4

2023-09-10 22:36:13

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@npub1gg8…439g I'm so happy! 💜💜💜💜💜 GenZ is the best of us.

2023-09-10 15:50:34

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@npub1gg8…439g
Good luck 🤗💜

2023-09-10 13:05:01

From March - feels like forever ago. Not looking forward to winter, I'm definitely a late spring/summer/early fall spirit.
#SilentSunday
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/040/979/631/493/246/original/f25899c43e928751.jpg

2023-09-09 20:25:21

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@npub1gg8…439g and you're apparently modest 😉

2023-09-09 20:20:31

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@npub1gg8…439g 💜
I'm so proud of you. You're so brave. I'm so happy to call you friend.

2023-09-09 18:07:47

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@npub1gg8…439g excellent
Congratulations! 🥂🎊

2023-09-06 14:53:30

This is stunning
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/018/768/758/045/580/original/972988899d633866.jpg

2023-09-05 22:11:55

I've reached the part of my day where I wonder if the 2 handfuls or so of the accounts that interact with me here are actually all the same person 🤔
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/111/014/828/231/414/330/original/d328150821a3e96c.mp4

2023-09-05 14:08:34

Blue Monday has been stuck in my head for days now @npub1gg8…439g
😂

2023-09-03 01:07:43

🎶
I'm the bad guy
Duh
🎶

2023-09-02 10:43:37

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@npub1px9…v9r5 McConnell will never resign. He's spent his entire life doing GOP evil. He'll die doing GOP evil.

2023-09-01 19:28:29

Vaccines for fall 💉
#COVID
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/09/01/briefing/covid-flu-vaccines.html

2023-09-01 14:43:22

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@npub1076…x7m7 @npub1jcn…0xst happy birthday TC 💜

2023-09-01 01:34:19

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@npub1gg8…439g oh, hon, don't say it like this to her.

2023-08-31 20:42:43

Republicans are misrepresenting the country’s crime problem.
#USPol
https://www.nytimes.com/2023/08/31/briefing/crime.html

2023-08-28 18:53:19

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@npub1gg8…439g
Oh, you know, I might talk with my hands when I get passionate about a topic.
I don't recommend doing that.

2023-08-28 18:48:06

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@npub1gg8…439g awe. I'll try to pay attention in meetings tomorrow to me and others.

2023-08-28 18:37:16

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@npub1gg8…439g
I've really never considered, either on my lap, holding my phone, or if I'm cold, I may be sitting on them lol

2023-08-27 22:43:25

Yeah
Fuck that guy
Yeah, that one
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/110/963/992/434/176/842/original/1e2a1a97bb698fc5.mp4

2023-08-27 16:34:38

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@npub1gg8…439g @npub1y26…694s
I know. It's a curse.

2023-08-27 16:01:00

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@npub1y26…694s
I support this.
For me, it's the intelligence and philanthropy. He wasn't "super", but skilled, smart. And the whole somewhat dark, brooding thing....

2023-08-25 23:27:54

I was a little concerned about potentially having to wear khakis by the name, which only make my ass look big, but this instance move has proven welcoming and fun.
Thanks to everyone over the week for properly indoctrinating me, I mean "welcoming" me, because it's not a cult.
Happy Friday. 💜

2023-08-25 15:18:07

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@npub1gg8…439g
I am, I am...I own what I do, I know what I'm responsible for, I'm damn good at my job. Sometimes I just need help when I have to "people".
Peopling is hard.
Putting this Friday in the win column.

2023-08-25 15:10:46

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@npub1gg8…439g I just finished, felt sick to my stomach, but I think it went well.

2023-08-25 11:56:02

It's rare that I feel intimidated, but my boss just called me and told me that I need to go represent at a meeting with top execs at 10:30 bc she no longer can due to a different urgent conflict.
So I have 2.5 hours to work up my brave girl and ignore the fact that everyone in the room is so many levels above me. I know the content as much, if not more, than anyone in that room and need to act like I earned a chair at the table.
💪

2023-08-24 21:05:58

To my surprise there are many nuts out in this excessive, dare I say, very moist, heat.
My inner child chuckled because I think I just kinda made a Schweddy Balls joke if you squint.
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/110/946/620/369/837/125/original/022a62b8f7df702a.mp4

2023-08-24 15:50:23

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@npub1hzf…8nrj
Dear, you are lovely.💜
If it helps any, I routinely don't like pictures of me and feel rather unattractive (ok, ugly some days). I'm not trans, but I think the societal pressures are similar in that we hope to appear a certain way because of some ideal we perceive.
Selfie therapy does help a little, sometimes. Validation is another important thing. You are surrounded by friends.🫂
Love the "prairie chic" style. You wear it well.
@npub1gg8…439g @npub1p8s…4tga @npub18lj…80hq

2023-08-24 15:18:33

Love this song and video. 🎩✨️💜
Still miss Tom Petty🕊
https://youtu.be/h0JvF9vpqx8?feature=shared
https://media.beige.party/media_attachments/files/110/945/241/726/801/533/original/dbd6f31ed587eb04.mp4