notabnormal

https://nicecrew.digital/users/notabnormal

tarded

Public Key

npub1ultqsg0caacm234wtxjaf5a7lsgsgk9cuc9477xgg88h8tmre0qsdfacky

NIP-05 Address

notabnormal_at_nicecrew.digital@momostr.pink

Profile Code

nprofile1qqsw04sgy8uw7ud4g6h9nfw56wl0cygytzuwvz6l0ryyrnmn4a3uhsg5vl7zx

Author Public Key

npub1ultqsg0caacm234wtxjaf5a7lsgsgk9cuc9477xgg88h8tmre0qsdfacky

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Last Notes

2024-08-17 16:25:13

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So, your baby is stress crying and so you go to see if it's the diaper. When you open up that sucker it's reasonably clean and dry and so you start to close it back up and try to calm the baby in some other way. Just when your hands are back in the blast radius, your little crying cannon releases a fart that instantly gives way to a fountain of poo that covers them, and at the same moment your baby is so relieved that the pressure is gone that she starts giggling happily.
This is truly a great moment in parenthood.

2024-08-17 16:17:47

My newborn girl is awesome. She's just shy of two months old and is stunningly good looking for a baby. Just pleasant, simple, symmetrical; blue inquisitive eyes that scan everything with beautifully innocent curiosity.
Her favorite thing is just sitting in the car seat in the backyard with me while I garden. Those intense gazers of hers dart up to the blue summer sky and the flowers in the trees above. She can stay out there for hours sleeping with the western breeze from the ocean on her cheeks in the shade.
Now I'm really good with babies. When my first one was born I couldn't even change a diaper. Now I could have breast milk puke running down my chest after a botched burping or have pumpkin orange baby diarrhea shooting across the room in the middle of a diaper change and I just laugh and keep soldiering forward. I can calm them down fast and usually figure out what their primary complaint is within a few minutes.
The Harvey Karp book that one guy told me to read was the second best parenting advice I ever got.
The first place trophy still goes to the guy who had six kids and made a good living as a piano player. I was dancing with my daughter at one of his gigs and after the show we talked a bit how great fatherhood is. He said, "You know the best parenting advice I ever got was 'never take anyone else's advice'".

2024-07-17 18:02:46

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You have to like the airport or you're not really a man. I don't make the rules :blob_shrug:

2024-07-12 13:54:26

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The golf courses should mostly go away with the boomers. I've seen two go belly up and bulldozed for condos in the last 20 years. We'll need the water more than the sport.

2024-07-07 04:08:16

https://media.nicecrew.digital/77812760772b727e170dfbec910fd9b79ba7d93d6bef2d5b6c460e01899d5fba.png

2024-07-03 23:41:13

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2024-07-03 22:33:30

My wife and I love Thai iced tea and it's officially iced tea season, but she's off of caffeine because she's breastfeeding. Getting it out in the wild is hopeless as everywhere that sells Thai iced tea makes it so sweet that a spoon would stand straight up in it. It's like the tea's just a type one diabetes delivery system for everyone besides my wife and I.
Came home and she made me a gallon and a half of the good homemade stuff even though she can't drink it.
The drawstring in my swim trunks got pulled into the waistband and, after some unsuccessful poking and pinching at it, I decided it was a lost cause. It was fixed the next day. My wife just smiled when I asked her about it. Shit like that to her is no big thing but it means a lot to me.

2024-07-03 21:54:34

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Frankenvagina with a responsible mask on it

2024-07-03 14:30:36

https://media.nicecrew.digital/d1ebe6d1483472cf4de4f8938d9e1cb53ee02551822c0f9bb51ba0992ac295f5.png

2024-07-02 23:45:48

https://media.nicecrew.digital/98277ebe6817d6f67fc5a2e89667b348744a1c576585895592629dc25403520b.jpg

2024-07-02 22:15:44

https://media.nicecrew.digital/9b6f96a382b4be1639b4dec1ff2764245317f3d73833230309fc0092f2f06fb9.png

2024-07-02 18:58:08

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What does take the ticket mean in this context?

2024-07-02 18:21:24

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Uberautist grilled cheese for retired OCD foodies: https://youtu.be/RllWJUvrxEY

2024-07-02 01:38:34

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I'm in 14, and the window seat guy will soon own no vital signs and everyone will be happy.

2024-07-02 01:22:57

https://media.nicecrew.digital/cdf9b8cd9853cc9fc68a31e04e4233803db2e3daaf9d62ca5405141e531fc1ff.png

2024-07-02 00:10:00

Saw @npub1g30…f2aj at the airport today, (no dox)
https://media.nicecrew.digital/fd99c26b1e0d10bf607fdb0104307a6e5d0c0c942ffd9b0d6c9b7a3373f03c25.png

2024-07-01 23:42:10

Retvrn
https://media.nicecrew.digital/17d877b19d6a4ffdfbc2122610497e44ba747bece508083acec518d6ba8aba15.jpg

2024-07-01 22:00:24

https://media.nicecrew.digital/300e23ab0f2a31e6c1d7ff146853daf8fc77a655c9b3529e090eff29aab4fe01.png

2024-07-01 21:53:57

https://media.nicecrew.digital/97341db5e9be1c19bfb7edca23348a66e6eca787b52f30dc377207e2255ffe3e.png

2024-07-01 00:16:34

https://media.nicecrew.digital/46cc55e7b8eaeec40f9c18b9f3fd85e47abaa63a0417f5622394fb3cde8f4993.png

2024-06-30 21:47:11

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Was just thinking this earlier. They kidnapped Whites over the centuries gradually interbreeding with us until they could pass for Turkish and then they immediately monopolized coining money and banking

2024-06-30 20:27:34

Bought my little toddler a big girl gift. It was half price as an opened box discount. I'll play with it and let her ask me what I'm doing and hopefully one day she'll find the cure for judaism.
https://media.nicecrew.digital/7fcbe2746ff24a1695845f31d84fd37836e79f1c2fbfded8ee0ab70e0e70e9ef.jpg

2024-06-30 19:36:02

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Blah blah, I stopped reading you now

2024-06-30 19:34:29

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That's a very handsome opinion, pain-feeler. It looks good on you

2024-06-30 19:33:19

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Your brain is too porn addled for me to have anything close to a successful convo lol

2024-06-30 19:32:09

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So you have some girl locked up against her will and pregnant, and you're talking to me about my choices?

2024-06-30 19:30:56

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Ah, so many self-gratifying assumptions. Your pain is delicious. But It doesn't make answering your questions worthwhile. You can believe self-gratifying fantasies without me.

2024-06-30 19:27:20

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I want some vital stats from you, quid pro quo like in silence of the lambs, Clarice. Tell me about why aren't surrounded by a harem of pregnant 13 year old supermodels?

2024-06-30 19:24:12

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That's a very make yourself placated and happy bet! All the cool kids stick to self-gratifying bs (belief systems)

2024-06-30 19:22:18

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Okay, great, your trophy is in the mail, is-declaring entity

2024-06-30 19:19:35

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The only dead bedroom is the one between your ears, guy who wants to fuck kids

2024-06-30 19:17:48

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lol yup, here goes the self-gratification fantasies. These must be better than you guys fantasizing about fucking little girls?

2024-06-30 19:16:52

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Maybe they just know you'll never ever make any woman climax

2024-06-30 19:16:12

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I'll reveal as much as she has never been on birth control, but just assume the worst about everything else because lmao what else are you going to do? I am not interested in divulging every last detail about my wife here today. Just relating some basic stats. Yes, it was sort of reckless even to try and start making two kids into our late thirties. I understand the many and valid criticisms against my choices here. I do not mind being an outlier on this fuckhole retarded zoo of a planet ffs.

2024-06-30 19:11:18

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Young girls in their teens are for men with no intellectual activity above their waists. It's normal because normal people are retarded animals.

2024-06-30 19:09:42

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lol, 1.) happy couples don't flood reddit with horror stories because they're too tired from fucking.
2.) Don't do it! Stay single. You'll be happier that way. I promise.

2024-06-30 19:05:17

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I married my wife when I was 39 and she was 36. We have two daughters now and we work well together as a team. Had I been looking for a twenty something piece of eye candy to marry, I doubt I'd be as happy as I am now. We'd be in two completely different worlds.

2024-06-30 15:08:11

Yup, I can still buy incandescent lightbulbs in California.
All is not lost, folks. :moonman4:

2024-06-30 02:18:36

This is the easiest newborn in the world. She bitches and moans and then gets quiet and happy and curious damn near immediately the minute she knows you're there and are attending to her needs. And her blue eyes haven't gone away - I think I might have a blue eyed girl.
Making new people is so cool.
Watching my toddler grow into her big sister role is another huge bonus. I really want to go back work. Being on paternity leave makes me sort of anxious to keep my nose to the grindstone. But I haven't had a chance to get too stressed out about it because my fam needs me home right now.

2024-06-29 13:21:49

My 38 year year old buddy just decided he wants to pitch for the Yankees.
https://media.nicecrew.digital/c1631f3a48811f793bb998194208b51214e7aaeb5f2e966b45d332bcb3d0976d.png

2024-06-29 12:01:05

https://media.nicecrew.digital/b94ba74dda065a551773f9d7d69a5fa22d03d6cccead808b6e46146f488070f6.png

2024-06-29 11:40:18

https://media.nicecrew.digital/8a7af9efa1a7317eb146261411ebe42f9dd6f61ae80730ebc57edd0433dc563a.png

2024-06-29 02:17:01

The PS5 has an off button
https://media.nicecrew.digital/bc5365de89c43281cbf328297c828f3fd40c3dfc1061dec70b5fa7747d65b7a8.png

2024-06-29 01:05:43

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Ugh, it would've been better if I had my head straight when you were skimming off unruly gabfags and then you could keep all of it. People I like like you and I feel like I let all of them down. But, pain and time are the only things that can teach me anything, apparently. Cheers.

2024-06-28 18:13:17

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Apologies for getting my cranky ass banned, guys, and thank you for generously refunding two months' of donations for me on my way out, Graf. I'm starting to get tempted to begin regularly donating to poast again too, my standing with poast notwithstanding lol. I'll buy lotto tickets today too just for the couple days of nice daydreams. It'd be funny to actually swing graf $17k and try to make it look lowkey and suspicious.

2024-06-27 01:46:50

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Zero because she turns them into life sized marionettes and has tea parties with them in her attic.

2024-06-25 16:18:57

And the fat, half black, half latino, tranny pansexuals shall inherit the earth?

2024-06-25 03:22:46

https://media.nicecrew.digital/309a7ec1f61d489cb5b958911bf2f6d75cae8e6422610ecf363d3e90058ad629.png

2024-06-25 00:38:19

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My toddler is already goth. She latched onto Halloween immediately as her favorite holiday. Her room is full of pumpkins and jackolanterns.

2024-06-24 19:43:48

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I had two in middle school. The loud fat kid rode the bus home on my route so we could fight. I greased him in my driveway in like ten seconds and he was not expecting that.
Second one was two twin brothers. They agreed to fight me one at a time, but when I had one of their shirts pulled over his head and I was kneeing him in his face, the other twin tried some videogame flying jumpkick at me while crying his eyes out. I moved out of the way and his foot went right into his poor brother's head lol.
No adult violence stories to write home about, though, thank God. But yeah, autobiographies are fun...

2024-06-24 15:44:54

https://media.nicecrew.digital/2603ccf9940272983e18a15104640ae8393f9f9d44a9e5f714a09cb7716878eb.png

2024-06-23 15:47:18

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Everyone knows they don't forget,
but some people learn the hard way
they don't forgive either.

2024-06-22 20:57:47

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Yeah, I was thinking Southwest

2024-06-22 20:25:29

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Up north 90 is usually more soggy and miserable. Down south 90 is usually more dry and tolerable.

2024-06-19 17:04:14

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I love it when one goes to the emergency room in the middle of the night with their first child who has a temperature of 103 and the whole place is full of third world nonsense that should be in the third world.

2024-06-19 04:17:13

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Bucees is not okay with this