CynAq 🤘

Jack of all trades, master of none, other than materials engineering. Managed to get a master's in that. I make documentaries too.
Cishet dude - he/him
#ADHD (probably #ActuallyAutistic)
#Humanist, not humanitarian
Proud #AntiFascist
#Videography : Semi-pro
I have a #documentary crew. I do #colorgrading, #postproduction
#Music : amateur
#WaterColors : noob

Header:None Avatar: marker drawn portrait of a giraffe with glasses

Public Key

npub1rc49dl4mv4te4qhxrlf6am2tgv3ncjv0lhtfkx5s6mwxmype8desrjf29d

NIP-05 Address

CynAq_at_neurodifferent.me@mostr.pub

Profile Code

nprofile1qqspu2jkl6ak24u6stnpl5awa495xgeufx8lm45mr2gddhrdjqunkucwlfal7

Author Public Key

npub1rc49dl4mv4te4qhxrlf6am2tgv3ncjv0lhtfkx5s6mwxmype8desrjf29d

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Last Notes

2024-07-18 21:41:43

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@npub1gzd…wfsq
I'm trying to teach myself to ask for things I need, let alone want.
not only subscribed to your rss feed, I bought your discography too, for inspiration.

2024-07-18 17:18:34

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@npub1gnx…d5kh you could even successfully argue tea and coffee are closer to each other than cyborgs and androids.

2024-07-18 15:04:16

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@npub1gnx…d5kh I know right?!
Using cyborg is possible but it's not the same thing, in terms of genre. So frustrating.

2024-07-13 23:14:58

You know what's NOT gonna happen after this?
Sensible gun control laws.

2024-07-11 10:16:21

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@npub16u7…uend I never thought I’d see “Björk is a bad singer” as a sentence. She is, in fact, phenomenal, like, not even merely good.

2024-07-05 04:51:45

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@npub1gnx…d5kh I’m still blanking but I know exactly how you feel 🫂

2024-07-05 04:42:32

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@npub1gnx…d5kh I want to say something but I’m scared of making you angrier, so my mind blanks 🫤

2024-07-03 11:49:51

The factoid that “MS copilot was more successful than 84% of college students at intro level college course tests” isn’t an indication that an LLM is doing something impressive.
It’s an indication that we failed a whole generation of young people by feeding them mediocrity and industrialized info packages instead of meaningful human education.
If you approach your education as a means of turning people into cogs in a machine, of course the machine will be more successful than most of them.
#AI #LLMs #Education

2024-07-01 10:29:35

We’re heading into global climate catastrophe and WWIII TOGETHER due to fascists climbing into power everywhere, and virtually everyone is talking about a different, trivial problem within this very apparent picture.
You need to be losing your shit, people.
Seriously.

2024-06-19 23:50:48

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@npub1k4q…3lsq aside from Victoria’s horrendous punctuation job, the point stands 💯

2024-06-19 11:43:45

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@npub1mdk…aptk how is (was?) food different for you?

2024-05-16 10:54:51

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@npub16u7…uend why is that? Did they scrap the old, probably hand made and well curated backend and put in an AI version but there wasn’t enough text to train it on?

2024-05-04 11:21:34

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@npub16u7…uend “Europeans are lazy and don’t work hard” is American copium at its finest.

2024-04-27 14:15:44

Noem’s “admission” about killing her unruly dog is a deliberate decision to signal “I am willing to kill the unruly people as a ruler”.
There’s no need to analyze it further than that. This is as loud as a fascist foghorn gets before sending the brownshirts.

2024-04-02 11:55:59

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@npub1gnx…d5kh thanks 😊 I think this is enough information for me to find it

2024-04-02 11:51:16

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@npub1gnx…d5kh what’s the name? I wanna check it out!

2024-02-09 13:27:43

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@npub1r4h…u0jf
*isn’t actually a hacker
*hangs out with all the other hackers and is nerd enough to seamlessly belong
*makes a mean mac&cheese
*thinks he’s cooler than all the other nerds

2023-12-11 14:12:19

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@npub1v6s…62n2 I’m leaning more on troll but of course, why not both?

2023-12-09 15:10:01

Yes, let’s end all encryption and publicize our every communication and piece of data in order to “protect children”, like we give all the surveillance powers possible to government to “fight terrorism”
From: @npub14ka…um78
https://mstdn.ca/@NMBA/111551073304339151

2023-12-08 03:14:09

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@npub1grx…uxfe for a demographic hell bent on machismo, they sure are triggered way too easily

2023-11-11 13:03:35

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@npub1cus…6789
it's official.
#ADHD is the exact opposite of aPhD

2023-11-10 12:48:14

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@npub1y9e…fqtl @npub1ccn…czwu my guess is they are just a yoga couple with tattoos

2023-11-08 13:38:44

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@npub1ler…g24g this is very interesting.
I think I have a poor tolerance for pain, especially heat related pain. I also have problems with anesthesia being less effective. I never received general anesthesia but with local stuff, I know it isn’t as effective as I thought it would be.
I’m not a readhead tho. I have dark, chestnut hair with red strands mixed in between. My beard also looks dark brown in general but in good light and up close, it has considerably more red in it than my hair. I wonder if this means I have some genes related to red hair but not all of them whatever they are.

2023-10-31 14:29:47

To me, #AuDHD feels like being a weirdly rolled d&d character.
Str 12, Dex 8, Const 4, Int 14, Wis 3, Chr 2
#ActuallyAutistic
@npub1mew…tau6 @npub1cr2…7v5x

2023-10-30 12:52:49

@npub1mew…tau6
I wanted to write a bloggish post about the etymology of the word autism, and I wanted to be precise as to how the word was coined.
The wikipedia article for "the history of autism" naturally came up first, with this disclaimer I'll attach.
It struck me as funny and slightly ironic that an article about autism was deemed "too long to read and navigate with too many overly lengthy quotations".
I wonder how the #ActuallyAutistic community feels about it.
https://media.neurodifferent.me/media_attachments/files/111/324/045/596/943/796/original/6a5b48c03bc76306.png

2023-10-20 23:52:03

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@npub1t2e…lf36 @npub1rrl…vzm7
I have a theory that the over-representation of ND peeps here on mastodon is sort of a self fulfilling prophecy.
I think it perpetuates itself as whenever a wave of new users occur, the NTs find the place unfathomable and leave, and the NDs find their communities and stay.
Maybe lack of popularity algorithm is good for us but not so much for NT folk.

2023-10-20 01:25:00

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@npub1t2e…lf36 I'm not well versed in the measurements of guy cuteness but I can kinda see how meeting a nice, skinny Ryan Gosling might have a positive effect on your mood 🙃

2023-10-19 23:49:41

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@npub1zdp…vqv8 Dd... does it have an inverted punisher logo for a face?

2023-10-19 15:25:12

I remember a weird polemic I got into at kindergarten. This is late eighties.
I was already reading at a... I don't know what level. I never understood what "reading levels" were anyway, I mean, if I can read, I can read, right?
Well... Turns out none of the other kids apparently were able to read, at least not openly, and reading was actively discouraged by the staff there. There was a storybook hour where everyone picked a story book with illustrations and PRETENDED to read.
I found out when the teacher lady noticed I was actually reading the thing and pulled it away from me, telling me I wasn't supposed to actually read the book with, you know, words printed on it. The justification was "if you read now and get good at it, you'll have a terrible time being bored in first grade when all the other kids are still trying to learn."
Lady, I don't think you understand how reading works. I can't UNLEARN how to read once I learned it.
This is still within my top five unfathomable school experiences.
#ActuallyAutistic @npub1mew…tau6

2023-10-19 10:04:01

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@npub10pr…qn7d I’m quite sure patching parts of old clothing together to make new ones or patching pieces of material together to make larger things had been around since people started making things.

2023-10-18 15:44:16

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@npub1t2e…lf36
It was more of a thing in my younger years. I learned to hold my tongue better or maybe I stopped giving too much of a f*ck, that I haven't encountered it too much lately.

2023-10-17 18:26:46

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@npub1t2e…lf36 That sounds absolutely infuriating.
I agree sometimes people don't use their brains, especially in stressful situations. Who knows what that mod was thinking but they clearly weren't in a state to understand your criticism.
The whole thing is so stupid, like, why would a non-Jew complain about synagogue membership fees? Why would a synagogue-going Jew be an antisemite? If that somehow happened, like let's say they got disillusioned by their faith and decided they'd be a bigot all of a sudden, why would they make their protests known by complaining about membership fees??
Like, wtf?

2023-10-13 16:03:05

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@npub1t2e…lf36 sure, me neither :blobcathuggiessad:
The end result is the same.
My "coping strategy" is imagining possible solutions to problems I suffer from so it helps me to engage in some reflection.
I can see how that might've been off-putting in your current state of mind though. I'm really sorry if I sounded insensitive.

2023-10-12 02:18:12

Yeah, ok, alright, but why would you reply to me before blocking me? How does that make any sense?

2023-10-09 09:04:08

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@npub1jeq…jglm YouTube is extremely skewed to the US market too though, which might have contributed to some selection bias as people learned what works with the algorithm and what doesn’t.
Of course, you obviously know a lot more about video game history and culture than I do because it’s your very serious interest. I might be wrong about my observation.

2023-10-09 08:51:22

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@npub1jeq…jglm I can’t relate at all.
I’ve always been a PC master race, only owned one NES compatible cheap console as a little kid but the PC was always there.
I look at PC gaming with nostalgia because it’s the only gaming I experienced.
What I’m trying to say is, it depends on the person (and culture) I think. US and Japan are much more console heavy than most other places. Eastern Europe is almost exclusively PC for example, or they own consoles alongside their PCs.

2023-10-05 22:56:06

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@npub1zdp…vqv8 just stand behind me, it’ll be alright.

2023-10-05 22:54:11

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@npub1zdp…vqv8 I take bullying very seriously and I won’t stand for it even for women in the name of empowerment.
If I see them beating up someone (I’m not concerned for myself), I’m pretty confident I can take all three with a baseball bat in my hand.
That’s what I’m gonna do about it.

2023-10-05 22:00:46

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@npub1uw8…88kr thanks for the answer, and I apologize if I sounded accusatory in my comment.
I left academia before I handed in my PhD dissertation which was three quarters written already because of burnout and systems I couldn’t exist in with a clear conscience were the culprit.
I’m neurodivergent and the way my brain is wired makes me extra sensitive to perceived injustices, dysfunctional rule sets such as the science credit requirement you mention etc.
I didn’t know I was wired differently at the time, and whenever these anti cheat measures and such practices put unnecessary stress on top of the expected amount from the assignment or exam itself, I blamed myself for not being smart enough or not studying enough. In reality, I was just having autistic meltdown after autistic meltdown during tests but I didn’t know that.
I guess I’m just venting here now but if I somehow managed to at least bring up a certain perspective as to how potential neurodivergent students might be affected from the additional stress, I’ll feel like I’ve done something useful.
Thanks again for the reply :)

2023-10-05 21:19:38

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@npub1uw8…88kr I don’t know. If cheat prevention due to a non-negligible number of students taking your class “not actually trying to learn things” is a primary concern which requires specific measures instead of a relaxed, participatory learning (and testing) environment, it sounds like there are larger, systemic problems here.
Of course I’m not suggesting there’s a problem with your teaching system. I’m talking about a larger system where students who don’t necessarily want to learn things are somehow compelled to take classes they don’t want to actively participate in.
Then, I’ve always been critical of the tendency to position students as bad faith actors in the design of teaching and evaluation methods which feels ever-present in academia, so there’s that.
As I said. I don’t know, and I don’t want to assume too much. It’s just that this whole post left a bad taste in my mouth.

2023-10-03 22:35:15

Yay, ND dot me is back! Lovely 🤘
I’m returning to my main account as long as it works. I’ll keep the c.im account for possible future interruptions.

2023-09-14 14:44:31

I'm finding that as I'm becoming more accepting of my own neurotype, I'm having an easier time differentiating what is more difficult for me vs what is easier. Similarly, I can now be increasingly confident in my coping strategies against burnout.
One thing I'm having more difficulty with is the sense of safety. Each day, I'm feeling more and more unsure of my safety within the world.
Accepting that I'm #ActuallyAutistic helps with my self acceptance, therefore with my self-care but it also drives home the fact that I'm fundamentally different, and certain problems I keep having with life are still insurmountable, even though they are not "my fault" anymore.
I don't know exactly where I'm going with this. I guess I'm trying to ask how do people of the autistic community handle the vulnerable position the acknowledgement of one's neurodivergence puts them in.
@npub1mew…tau6

2023-09-11 12:40:57

My biggest disagreement with life in general, and I now believe this is the fundamental difference between how my brain operates and how the average NT brain does, is how things are prioritized.
In my brain, things are prioritized per their material utility. If something has immediate utility, a visible benefit to someone, or if it's solving a pressing problem, they are on top of the importance list. It may sound like a callous way to put it but health related, life saving action is categorized in the "high material utility" bin for my brain.
In addition to this prioritization, I also tend to equate difficulty of a task with its perceived importance. "If something is very important, then the stakes must be high also" my brain says. On the flipside, if I know something is trivial to accomplish physically, it's not "important" in my brain.
In the life made by NTs for NTs, most "very important" things are trivial to the extreme. Bureaucratic paperwork, deadlines, remembering birthdays, most jobs are just mindless busywork to me, with no perceived importance whatsoever, but somehow they seem potent enough to stop the world in its tracks for the majority of people.
This creates enormous stress for me, and is responsible for most of my burnouts in my 50 year life. The dichotomy between my sense of priority and that of the world around me.
When I was still in my PhD program, the work I did, the information I and my team uncovered were the priority for me. The integrity of the work was paramount. Increasingly, through the feedback I received from my advisor, I started feeling like something was wrong and the real thing to focus on should have been how I marketed my research and my efforts rather than the work and the results themselves. This led to my burnout and me leaving before I defended my dissertation.
I'd like to hear everyone's thoughts on this topic. Do you also think your version of what's important is fundamentally different than the world's?
#ActuallyAutistic @npub1mew…tau6

2023-09-09 11:39:13

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@npub1grx…uxfe I never studied traditional textiles (it’s its own separate discipline outside of material science) but I from other woven fiber knowledge I have, I can speculate.
If the curtain was directly blasted for years, my first inclination would be the damp/dry cycles the fabric would have went through. The expanding-contracting cycles might have disentangled the individual cotton fibers in the threads.
Another possibility is that if that sheet of curtain was significantly more damp than the others for long periods of time, the water alone could have had a chance to unravel the threads.
One more extreme scenario could be that the AC air might’ve introduced more bacteria, mold spores etc, some of which could be capable of degrading cotton fibers.
Of course I thought of one more unpleasant mechanism, which is the water on the curtain dissolving CO2, thus becoming acidic and eating through the textile. Though I think this would take more humidity and CO2 concentration than what you would have in an everyday AC’d room.
So yeah, I’d say AC air blasting into a cotton curtain degrading it is plausible.