Fake Yarra Trams / is on Nostr

Real news from a fake perspective, about tram life in Melbourne. Account also used by Depot Cat, who we find really obnoxious.

Last Notes

2025-04-08 22:30:01

Due to a rally today trams will be delayed across the network. The rally is to protest against protestors delaying trams. All trams will be blocked, and services will resume after the protesters board trams to leave. Trams that can’t get to them due to the rally. #YarraTrams

2025-04-03 10:32:47

Claims I stole a hamburger tonight are false. It was a cheezburger, and as the website says, I can has cheezburger. So it was mine to take. ~Depot Cat
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2025-03-16 00:00:06

Kicked out of the Grand Prix race yet again, this time because they say my helmet doesn’t meet FIA regulations.
Well the joke is on you, I already used all the sand traps as kitty litter, so no need to race, I’ve already won. ~Depot Cat
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2024-12-05 21:30:05

Who needs an elf on the shelf, when you’ve got a lamb on a tram.
Major delays due to livestock disrupting services today, seek alternative transport arrangements. #YarraTrams
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2024-11-27 22:29:07

- reply

@nprofile…q4cu We have Depot Cat for ours, which is why we buy electricity instead.
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2024-11-27 21:30:04

Throwback Thursday: On tour edition.
Perth had trams from 1899 until 1958, when the hamster used turn the wheel and make electricity died. They got rid of the trams and to this day are still looking for a replacement hamster to get the power back on in the State. #YarraTrams
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2024-11-03 21:30:01

It’s less than a month now until the new franchisee takes over the running of #YarraTrams. Apart from prawn heads in the curtain rods, and glad wrap on the toilets, is there anything else we can do to make them feel welcome? Asking for a friend.

2024-11-03 21:30:01

2024-10-13 21:30:06

Remember to always give way to trams. Mind you everyone here is driving on the wrong side of the road, so it was bound to happen. #YarraTrams
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2024-10-11 01:00:04

I’m all ready for PAX this weekend, I hope to see you there. ~Depot Cat
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2024-07-18 01:35:53

tramTRACKER is currently experiencing technical issues. Someone keeps chewing on the wires. Please refer to timetables at stop or ptv.vic.gov.au/journey for time arrival times. We apologise for the inconvenience and curse Depot Cat. #YarraTrams
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2024-05-04 00:10:47

As you can see, humans, your attempts to pat me have failed. Now witness the firepower of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL battle station! ~Depot Cat
#Maythe4thBeWithYou
#StarWarsDay
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2024-04-30 22:31:01

After community consultation we have redesigned the new G class tram, to fit more in with the recommendations.
But to be honest, we think Depot Cat may have swayed the results somehow. What do you reckon? #YarraTrams
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2023-12-21 21:30:52

#YarraTrams would like to remind all parents, that with the school year now over, please check your child’s bag for that banana which has been in there since April, an old excursion slip, and the remains of Harold Holt. You’re bound to find at least two of those items in there.