Linux Is Best on Nostr: I do not hide my content. I was forced to live in someone's shadow for years, and so ...

I do not hide my content. I was forced to live in someone's shadow for years, and so if the topics of physical abuse, emotional abuse, financial abuse, social abuse, legal abuse, and sexual abuse and sexual assault bothers you (triggers you)

-- You should stop reading now.


OK, you were warned.

My ex-wife, is not a normal human being. I do not say that lightly, or even to be mean. For 16 years after our devoice (since 2009), she still calls up my phone (usually from a hospital or pharmacy), and repeats the same 5 words: "I can still touch you".

My ex-wife beat me and raped me, and told me, if I ever tried leaving her or if I told people what she was doing to me, she would wrongfully accuse me of harming her. I am not an idiot, and I know exactly how that would have played out. This was a woman who laughed at the "me too" movement, and asked if I would like to know the experience, the one time I tried talking back. And for years, I could not walk out the door, as much as I wanted to do so.

The children she had, were not my own. She knew this, but I didn't know this fact until near the end of our marriage, and by end, I mean just as the paper work was being finalized (when I got the DNA results). I had full emergency custody, granted me by the courts, and I could not understand why the "department of family services" kept trying to reunite her kids, when everyone, included her doctor and the judge, thought that was not wise.

The condition of me having custody, in fact, was that I keep the kids (two boys) away from her. Only for someone within the court to lie with claim she was over my place with the children daily (obvolute, not true), and that as an office of the court, they had witnessed this (again, not true). Then immediately give her the kids the same day.

I was a good father, in my opinion. I played human shield quite well. Because the first rule of being a parent is to protect your kids anyway you can. And if that means, taking physical damage, so she cannot break the crib with the children inside of it, or attempt to throw them out with the trash, you do everyone you can to keep them safe. I am the one, who called, child family services. Because as a father, unlike a mother, you cannot just walk out the door with the children and vanish into the night. Anymore, then you can claim your wife is raping you, and expect to receive justice, or avoid her from making false claims in return.

Having said that, I did cross into Canada a few times. Looked in the back seat of the car, and thought, would this be the life for them?!

But I digress. When I found out they were not mine, I was both heartbroken, angry, but sometime later a sense of relief in knowing, I could walk away. Mentally and emotionally, I did not want a lifetime with my rapist, jailer, and abuser.

People sometimes say, that everyone has a breaking point, often when someone does something terrible wrong. I always presumed that was an excuse to justify the horribly things people had done, after doing them. I do not necessarily believe that anymore. If it was not for my sister-in-law, my ex-wife, her father, and mother, would all be dead, and I would either be dead or locked up. They were more than aware of the horribly things she was doing, while also enabling her.

I "won" my freedom, but obtaining proof of her sexual relationship with her father. She had been molested from the ages of 13-17, and her mother treated her like the other woman. Sometimes after our married, that relationship started up with her being a willing participant, and even defending it. "A daughter's right" she called it. I want to vomit every time I think about that. I get upset, recalling how her mother told me, it was none of my business.

For 16 years, I've thought of this as a "Cold War". I cannot have the justice I want and deserve, but she cannot make false accusations either. It is, however, why I think she resurfaces every once in a while. My therapist claims it was all about power and control with her, and me reclaiming my power is not something she can fully accept.

13 years after our devoice, after I told her to "fuck off" instead of just handing up, like I usually do, suddenly she wanted child support. I was ready for this. I knew, as my therapist knew, my ex-wife likes to get off on the pain and suffering from others, plus she likes to feel "big" (powerful and in charge), while others feeling small and helpless. I suspected it was only a matter of time, before telling me she could "still touch me" was not going to be enough.

She does not need child support. As I said, she waited 13 years to file such a motion. Her family is very financially secure. They're the type of people who live in a 3-story house, 4th if you count the entertainment center in the basement, while buying out all the seats in section 1A of Boeing 747, so their family can all gather for Christmas, on top of the fact that they'll claim they are "struggling" because now they can only go on vacation 3x this year, instead o 4x, while having multiple timeshares around the country, and 3 cars - one of them being a luxury sports car.

But I digress, again. The children are not mine, and she waited 13 years to demand support. But I was ready - Nothing is in my name. I own nothing. No property, no car, nothing. This computer, for example, not mine. My job? Someone works for Meta, but technically, not me, and not in the United States either. Bank account? Nothing exist, here. You'll find nothing in my name, anywhere.

And that is why my ex-wife's child support, is only 12 bucks. It came out to about 16 bucks, because they add another 4 for processing. I believe, it was per week. I truly do not care. Because my ex-wife is never going to get a penny directly from me. I am not going to support my rapist and the child she made with someone else. Would you? Don't answer that questions, I'm sure some moron will tell me - think about the children - Well, good for you, go get beaten, raped, as I was, and go support your rarest's children, that are not yours, since you feel so strongly about it.

The levy that was issued recently, worthless. It has taken all this time to finally reach 2,500, and there is nothing for anyone, anywhere to find.

The only thing that is "mine" in this whole apartment, is the boxers I am wearing, plus the gerd medication. Now, it would not be the 1st time my ex-wife took my boxers. In fact, when she came to get her stuff, during our divorce, the court order was vague and said she could collect anything that was hers, but didn't specify what was hers. The policy office at the time said I was being petty, when I verbally protested as she took the food out of the refrigerator, along with everything else in the house. If the refrigerator was not the landlords, she would have taken that too.

That imagine has stayed in my mind for years. And anytime I thought I could forge that fact or move on, my ex-wife has randomly called up - sometimes days apart, sometimes months apart, sometimes a year, and said, "I can still touch you", and then hung up.

But I digress, once more. Ever item in this rented house, was not bought by me or in my name. Even the bird (Phoenix and Athena), are registered as support animals for a family member. If you follow the paper money trail, all of it, not mine.

On paper, I am a bum, with a lot of free time, and no earthly possessions. And right now, I am quite proud of that fact.