Dr. Nicole LePera
@Theholisticpsyc:
As a couples therapist, I noticed 7 patterns within couples who "made it."
1. They were friends:
They genuinely enjoyed spending time with each other. They were excited to come home to each other and catch up after a long day. They liked doing little things together. Friendship was the basis of their relationship.
2. They had been through really dark times:
They had all been through really difficult periods where they were at a crossroads and even had second thoughts. But, they choose to stay together and work through it. This established trust.
3. They made light of each others quirks
They appreciated and acknowledged the quirks in each other. Even if they were at times annoying, they made light of them and were never hyper critical.
4. They let each other be themselves
There was a base level of respect and admiration for each other rather than a desire to change each other. This freedom brought out the best parts of each of them.
5. They fought
They got on each others nerves, they fought, and were frustrated with each other at times. But they knew how to navigate conflict, bounce back, and move forward.
6. They had difficult conversations
They communicated regularly and were open to each other's perspectives. They didn't cope by avoiding or denying. Emotional regulation was present so conversations rarely became explosions.
7. They had boundaries with family
They put the relationship first and had clear boundaries with family. They didn't vent to them about issues or make decisions based on what their families wanted. They did what was best for their partnership, together.
Michele McCarthy /
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2023-08-23 16:58:47
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2023-08-23 16:58:47Event JSON
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"content": "Dr. Nicole LePera\n@Theholisticpsyc: \n\nAs a couples therapist, I noticed 7 patterns within couples who \"made it.\" \n\n1. They were friends:\n\nThey genuinely enjoyed spending time with each other. They were excited to come home to each other and catch up after a long day. They liked doing little things together. Friendship was the basis of their relationship.\n\n2. They had been through really dark times:\n\nThey had all been through really difficult periods where they were at a crossroads and even had second thoughts. But, they choose to stay together and work through it. This established trust.\n\n3. They made light of each others quirks\n\nThey appreciated and acknowledged the quirks in each other. Even if they were at times annoying, they made light of them and were never hyper critical.\n\n4. They let each other be themselves\n\nThere was a base level of respect and admiration for each other rather than a desire to change each other. This freedom brought out the best parts of each of them.\n\n5. They fought\n\nThey got on each others nerves, they fought, and were frustrated with each other at times. But they knew how to navigate conflict, bounce back, and move forward.\n\n6. They had difficult conversations\n\nThey communicated regularly and were open to each other's perspectives. They didn't cope by avoiding or denying. Emotional regulation was present so conversations rarely became explosions.\n\n7. They had boundaries with family\n\nThey put the relationship first and had clear boundaries with family. They didn't vent to them about issues or make decisions based on what their families wanted. They did what was best for their partnership, together.",
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