unnecessary, but here's what happened the night he "broke up" with me: I was too tired of the bullshit to go to the bar and listen to these men talk shit about me in front of my face. it's a vibe. his friends were cool for a moment but in politically charged scenarios like this, just saying one 'mean' thing about immigrants is gonna make them treat you like you're evil. I'm not evil, I'm just not stupid.
so I was like nah imma sleep have fun.
he comes back around 4am and he's upset cause I didn't go. we talk and I'm like...I think you're too young and stupid to understand what's going on here. he goes cold. like. even I knew it was OVER OVER at that point and I was just gonna have to deal with the pure sadness of having to go through another fairly public thing-gone-wrong. but the thing inside me that went wrong is that I did, in fact, completely sublimate myself to the notion that I could escape my future. why?
there are times that even I am afraid of it. I'm afraid that there's no actual man who can handle the pressure like I can and have, even though I haven't even handled it all that well! I'm just dumb sometimes and I wanna believe that this egotistical nobody can someday become a worthy somebody, but the fact is that I don't fundamentally respect men who haven't had to work for it.
I'm not gonna go into anymore of these Prove-It situations where my cleaning somebody's disgusting bathroom is like a sign that I'm humble. no, I literally just refuse to expose myself to all of your weird germs and mold and filth that you are too fucking lazy to clean yourself.
like. apologies for failing the "does she like male prostitutes?" test but the answer is no I do not and yes I have high expectations of men because last thing I need is some Kevin Federline ass mfer giving me babies then destroying my life cause he wants...stuff.
honestly, it's the kind of thing that makes me realize how important it is to marry a man who understands the traumas of being cash poor with an extremely high net worth. eliminate the whole "using for money" problem and you actually can get to the heart of things.
but damn bro. like. when people are always looking for ways to prove you're evil, they basically end up burning themselves at the stake to find evidence of your dark arts. my dark art is that I know what you're doing and I won't say anything about it until the day I'm done thinking the act is funny and kinda charming. not to be condescending, but that's what happens when men aren't up front with me about who they are and whatever.
no, it's not normal at all but it's necessary.
if you haven't noticed, there's a crowd out there and the line to get in is getting extremely thin cause all the bouncers at the club know who's just here to say they made it.
npub1zh…ggdq0
2024-12-22 10:51:39
Author Public Key
npub1zhczn9r98qetlmq0840xt6rpehmh9wjl0x6gp83n3m55kgwvf37snggdq0Published at
2024-12-22 10:51:39Event JSON
{
"id": "e627f5d6c1eb1834eaa274d18f61e5b681437673907c1f869a283d25775aebb1",
"pubkey": "15f02994653832bfec0f3d5e65e861cdf772ba5f79b4809e338ee94b21cc4c7d",
"created_at": 1734864699,
"kind": 1,
"tags": [],
"content": "unnecessary, but here's what happened the night he \"broke up\" with me: I was too tired of the bullshit to go to the bar and listen to these men talk shit about me in front of my face. it's a vibe. his friends were cool for a moment but in politically charged scenarios like this, just saying one 'mean' thing about immigrants is gonna make them treat you like you're evil. I'm not evil, I'm just not stupid.\n\nso I was like nah imma sleep have fun.\n\nhe comes back around 4am and he's upset cause I didn't go. we talk and I'm like...I think you're too young and stupid to understand what's going on here. he goes cold. like. even I knew it was OVER OVER at that point and I was just gonna have to deal with the pure sadness of having to go through another fairly public thing-gone-wrong. but the thing inside me that went wrong is that I did, in fact, completely sublimate myself to the notion that I could escape my future. why?\n\nthere are times that even I am afraid of it. I'm afraid that there's no actual man who can handle the pressure like I can and have, even though I haven't even handled it all that well! I'm just dumb sometimes and I wanna believe that this egotistical nobody can someday become a worthy somebody, but the fact is that I don't fundamentally respect men who haven't had to work for it.\n\nI'm not gonna go into anymore of these Prove-It situations where my cleaning somebody's disgusting bathroom is like a sign that I'm humble. no, I literally just refuse to expose myself to all of your weird germs and mold and filth that you are too fucking lazy to clean yourself.\n\nlike. apologies for failing the \"does she like male prostitutes?\" test but the answer is no I do not and yes I have high expectations of men because last thing I need is some Kevin Federline ass mfer giving me babies then destroying my life cause he wants...stuff.\n\nhonestly, it's the kind of thing that makes me realize how important it is to marry a man who understands the traumas of being cash poor with an extremely high net worth. eliminate the whole \"using for money\" problem and you actually can get to the heart of things.\n\nbut damn bro. like. when people are always looking for ways to prove you're evil, they basically end up burning themselves at the stake to find evidence of your dark arts. my dark art is that I know what you're doing and I won't say anything about it until the day I'm done thinking the act is funny and kinda charming. not to be condescending, but that's what happens when men aren't up front with me about who they are and whatever.\n\nno, it's not normal at all but it's necessary.\n\nif you haven't noticed, there's a crowd out there and the line to get in is getting extremely thin cause all the bouncers at the club know who's just here to say they made it. ",
"sig": "aeaa4ea9677f1a238e33e8e019c61374dd8f512295bf33da01d65369b65a92ff2fd5a99b4e69f46510305583c93a58dc8ccdecb751aea340edc331936720f2d7"
}