HMG_NON on Nostr: 🦀わたしの原動力#3 ...

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🦀わたしの原動力#3


24日、25日と仕事の連休の日に、家族で城崎に旅行に行ってきた。

ちょうど、1月15日が、ばぁちゃんの80歳の誕生日と両親の36周年の結婚記念日だったから、それもあって、前から予定を経ててた。


今まで、誕生日でも、結婚記念日でも家族に何もしてきた事が無くて、むしろ10代の頃の母の日なんて、万引きで捕まって、両親に迎えに来て貰った事もあったくらいだけど、


歳を重ねていく毎に、当たり前の事が当たり前じゃない気持ちが大きくなってきて、満足のいくお金の使い方も変わってきた気がする。



元々、ブランド物とかそーゆーのに興味が無い方ではあったけど、誰かに喜んで貰える使い方が自分の中では、予想以上に満足出来る事が意外だった。



小さな頃、お父さんは、わたしが絵を描いて見せる度に、「お前は才能があるなぁ〜」
って良く褒めてくれた。



お母さんからは、学校で書く作文とか、よく褒めて貰っていた気がする。



もしかすると、昔から誰かに喜んで貰える事がわたしの原動力でやる気に繋がっていたように思う。



それと同時に、段々と体力も落ちて、自分の言葉や言動に、自信を無くしていってるような両親を見て、


「お父さんと、お母さんが抱いた気持ちは、全部正解なんだよ。」



って事を、何歳になっても世界と両親へ証明したい。


絵を描く1番の理由は、ただ楽しいし、癒されるからだけど、根底には、そんな気持ちがあるのかなと思った。



#3 My driving force

I went on a trip to Kinosaki with my family on the 24th and 25th and on consecutive holidays from work.

January 15th happened to be Grandma's 80th birthday and her parents' 36th wedding anniversary, so it was planned well in advance.


Up until now, I've never done anything to her family on her birthday or wedding anniversary, rather on Mother's Day when I was a teenager, I was caught shoplifting and came to pick her up from her parents. As much as I received it,


As I get older, I feel that things that are taken for granted are not taken for granted, and I feel that the way I spend my money satisfactorily has changed.



Originally, I wasn't interested in branded items or anything like that, but it was surprising that I could use it to make someone happy and be more satisfied than I expected.



When I was little, my father used to tell me, "You have talent," whenever I drew a picture.
He gave me a good compliment.



I feel like my mother often praised me for writing essays at school.



Perhaps, since long ago, making someone happy has been my driving force and motivation.



At the same time, I saw my parents who were gradually losing their physical strength and losing confidence in their own words and actions.


"The feelings that your father and mother had are all correct."



I want to prove that to the world and my parents no matter how old I am.



The number one reason why I draw is because it's fun and heals me, but I wonder if that's the underlying feeling.









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