Sag3s on Nostr: A real confession from a real Gooner (M38) TLDR; I don't want to get help for my porn ...

A real confession from a real Gooner (M38)

TLDR; I don't want to get help for my porn addiction. I know its extreme. I know I need porn to function and regulate my life. This is just how things are now. I stopped fighting a long time ago. Porn is a part of my life forever.

Porn has made a positive impact on my life. Even though most will never understand this, this message is not for them. This message is for the fallen and broken that are looking for a new way to live.

So for the 'no fappers' that want me to change or for you to "save me" don't bother. For those that really want to read a TRUE and REAL confession about a Porn addict, let's continue.

Many people turn to porn for many reasons. Many people turn to porn to cope to have a short escape and to feel good. No one EVER talks about how every negative event and trauma stacks on top of itself until all that's safe in your life is porn.

No one has ever been able to tell me the benefits of "quitting porn" when there is nothing really for me to fall back on if i ever did. What do you do when you know there is no one to tell you "good job" or someone to say "I love you" or someone to welcome you with open arms congratulate you for quitting porn?

What do you do when there is no net positive to quitting but also your porn addicted life doesn't interfere with normal functioning? - I'm one of these people.

I don't have answers for what to do "after porn" - And I personally am proud of how much I've integrated my pornography addiction into my life.

Honestly, I'm more disappointed that anti-porn 'activism' i just a hobby for folks that need an 'enemy' to feel good about themselves. My message around porn addiction is always "love yourself and don't hate yourself"

While most gooners get off with degrading themselves, i have elevated myself so much emotionally and spiritually using this as a tool to heal some of my traumas and hangups in life.

Thant being said, I say this. I maintain a home. I work full time. I have other hobbies.

My social interactions were total shit and eventually I just got tired of caring once I got older. If it is not transactional, its usually not a good interaction for me. It's just how the world is. Most people really don't care about anything outside themselves. Some build families and those less fortunate build their own world. I made a new world centered around porn.

I don't feel bad about how porn as shaped my mind, my life choices, my sexuality, everything. I know my sexual kinks have gone well past any uninitiated 'normie.'

Honestly there is so much shit a normie can't handle that I consider them an NPC without a soul.

I don't see normies as real people anymore. Just placeholders to find that one sparkle of a person that actually is genuine with themselves.

Just know that true porn addicts out there are functional and rational human beings. It's just their sexual kinks and preferences have changed. No one really has positive discussions about this. All you hear is "you should quit porn its bad."

It's so much more to porn and gooning than that. You get out what you put in.