Good afternoon NOSTR fam!
It's a beautiful day in the #KeystoneState. Enough so that I will transmit some of this beautiful weather to your corner of the globe if it is cloudy.
Much on the brain this am. Apologies in advance for the diahreah of thought.
This morning's miles were a casual hike. I woke up a little sore and wasn't sure why because I hadn't done anything different....so I thought. More on that at the end of the note.
I'm back in the city, 3 days earlier then originally planned. I learned early this morning that sister #3 (the youngest) is coming through with pops for the weekend.
I had to get back to the city and make the house presentable. Translated means ~change the sheets in the spare bedroom and wash dusty towels in the spare bathroom (both are used 2 maybe 3 times a year).
Pops lives primarily in Haiti but comes through once a year typically for about a month to "put eyes" on family, as he calls it.
During that visit he puts eyes on his kids, grandkids, his siblings (my 2 aunts) my mom, and maybe a few other close friends and family members.
It's been this way for about 15 years. Since he moved back to Haiti from the Empire state.
This year I'm looking forward to this visit more then any previous year for one main reason. I need to interview him.
In the last 12 months sisters (number 1 & 3) on different occasions have "accused" me of behaving very much like our father. My initial reaction in both cases was...well not good.
My initial thoughts following both instances were of all the ways my pops and I were different.
1 - My pops has never in his life set foot in a bar.
As for me, from the age of 25-35 my livingroom was a bar on most weekdays.
2 - Growing up my dad would drink and get silly 2 (maybe 3) times a year and it was always at home, a party he planned and only open to family.
In retrospect, I think he mostly did it to make mom happy. She liked to see him let loose and be silly every once in a while. Few ever got to see that side of him.
As for me getting tipsy or drunk is just another Saturday, sometimes maybe a Tuesday. Still even today if I'm honest with you all.
3 - My pops has never said the words "I am sorry" or "I was wrong". Even when he was.
As for me, I always own my isht. Especially in situations where mini me and her mom was involved.
4 - My pops has never had a traffic violation, a ticket or been in trouble with the law.
As for me. Well just say, not the case.
5 - My pops spoke the words "I love you son" to me for the first time when I was 21 y/o.
Growing up I never doubted he loved me, it was just never spoken. He spoke those words to me for the first time when I was going out on my first deployment, I didn't know how long I'd be gone and he picked up on unspoken hints that I thought I'd covered up.
He was worried, "I'm a radio nerd pops. I'm not going to be near anything that might get me hurt." It wasn't a lie, just not the whole truth. He knew the deal.
I on the other hand speak those words (I love you) to mini me every single time I speak to or meet her. I say it to my friends even when it makes them feel uncomfortable. Hah. Especially when it makes them feel uncomfortable.
It's been that way with mini me since before she even knew what they words meant.
As for that first deployment...it ended up being a nothing burger and it was over pretty fast. I was very lucky.
Unlike so many of the generations after me. Back to back tours and multi-decade long conflicts. Woooosa! I'll stop there.
And lastly....
5 - there's a tyrannical side to pops. It's his way always. Conform or leave.
As for me....well. I don't think the pooch would agree that I am this way.
So these were the initial thoughts that came to mind on both occasions from 2 siblings when they accused me of having similar traits/behaviors to pops.
My feelings have changed much since those initial "accusations" (last September the most recent case). I no longer see my sisters remarks as an "accusation".
I think I get why they see some parts of my pops in me, and I'm both honored and humbled.
I plan to get the pair drunk this weekend, find out what they really think, and maybe I'll share this note with them.
Have a bangin day friends.
✊🤘🙏💜✊👍🤜🤛🫂
👇👇👇👇👇👇👇 This morning's hike.
https://imgur.com/a/nUHV7pa