I've managed to sit quietly and read through your story twice now. I enjoyed it both times!
Your preamble leaves me wondering if you've had other encounters? And the opening paragraph, why you noticed nothing strange during your first visit with Kim... Subtly raising questions in the reader's mind is a good way to keep them reading...
I felt the roller coaster ride to the park, as well as the heat and humidity, and the suspense about feeling a premonition as you all played.
Somehow, the basketball going over the fence into the woods seems like more than random chance... And the gravelly voice must have been downright creepy!
I liked the humorous ending.😃
The only addition I might have asked for would have been some details from the moss covered tombstone.
Great story!😃
Duncan Cary Palmer
npub1cx…mexlq
2025-05-16 17:44:25
in reply to nevent1q…s6el
Author Public Key
npub1cxp3l03x20mkzezzr4takm8w8zuva7xwvacmcewp97z58hjt8xls3mexlqPublished at
2025-05-16 17:44:25Event JSON
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"content": "I've managed to sit quietly and read through your story twice now. I enjoyed it both times!\n\nYour preamble leaves me wondering if you've had other encounters? And the opening paragraph, why you noticed nothing strange during your first visit with Kim... Subtly raising questions in the reader's mind is a good way to keep them reading...\n\nI felt the roller coaster ride to the park, as well as the heat and humidity, and the suspense about feeling a premonition as you all played.\n\nSomehow, the basketball going over the fence into the woods seems like more than random chance... And the gravelly voice must have been downright creepy!\n\nI liked the humorous ending.😃\n\nThe only addition I might have asked for would have been some details from the moss covered tombstone.\n\nGreat story!😃",
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