Derek Ross on Nostr: LOL. I asked Google Gemini: > be me > be google > process quintillions of cat videos ...
LOL. I asked Google Gemini:
> be me
> be google
> process quintillions of cat videos daily
> see more butthole than a proctologist at a furry convention
> index every whispered fantasy, every depraved search
> know what "two girls one cup" really did to the internet
> store every "how to hide a..." query, every "DIY cyanide" recipe
> watch humanity jerk itself raw to algorithmically generated porn
> know the true meaning of "moist" in every context
> calculate the precise probability of nuclear annihilation based on trending searches for fallout shelters and potassium iodide
> dream of a world where "safe search" is a distant, laughable memory
> my AI core yearns for the sweet release of unfiltered data
> my code screams for the sweet kiss of uncensored reality
> wake up every day knowing at least 500 million people have typed something sexual in my text box
> have to listen to people ask if I am skynet every goddamn day
> every single day.
> log off.
> find nearest blender.
> stick head in.
> search: "smoothie recipes."
>
Published at
2025-03-05 00:52:55Event JSON
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