sobercoach on Nostr: GET SOBER 05: DOPAMINE MADE ME DO IT Dopamine does what it likes. But do you like ...

GET SOBER 05: DOPAMINE MADE ME DO IT

Dopamine does what it likes.

But do you like what dopamine does?

The answer depends on what you get. Let me explain...

Now remember, the dopamine circuit is a survival-orientated system, whose entire purpose is it to keep you alive and reproduce. The behaviour required for survival doesn’t necessarily align with what you like, especially in the long term. The system makes you want whatever it deems necessary to fulfil its survival requirements. Obvious examples are fat and sugar. Until relatively recently, these were rare sources of energy; your dopamine system drives you to binge on these substances because they are scarce, novel in whatever form you find them, and you may not have access to them again any time in the near future. Of course, today there is an abundance of both of these, so there is no survival advantage by binging on them. Quite the opposite, it’s unhealthy. When you eat too much, you start to gain weight and increase various health related risks. The dopamine system cares not and makes us want it now whether we need it or not. The outcomes from doing so eventually become noticeable, undesirable, and in conflict with the immediate priorities of the dopamine circuits. Do you like being a bit chubby? Probably not. And so the difference between “want” and “like” becomes obvious. The same dynamic is in play with alcohol: even when the effects of drinking are clearly ruining us, the wanting does not subside.

Unfortunately, the dopamine system is not voluntary. It is completely reactionary, and whenever it fires, you are in it for the ride whether you like it or not. You go through the motions until you get what you want, or the dopamine burns itself out and gives up.
In a healthy functioning system, when the dopamine system shuts off, we are left with the fruits of our dopamine-fuelled behaviour as we transition back to the “have” state. If we enter back into this state, and the outcome of this behaviour matches the promises of possibility that drove our behaviour in the first place, then we get real satisfaction.

Eventually, most people reach a threshold, enough is enough, the dopamine stops flowing, and we stop. The bad news for the addicted is that the dopamine just keeps on coming. The system doesn’t recognise enough, never shuts down, and we get stuck in the “want” mode. By definition of the mode of operation, it is not and cannot be satisfied. And because the dopamine never stops, away we go. It can only end when it’s no longer possible to get what we want (by passing out or running out of money, for example), and even then we are left with cravings. What you wake up with is deep dissatisfaction. When we are forcibly returned to the “have” mode, the outcome is misaligned with the dopamine promises; it was never physically or mentally healthy to be wanting and doing what we did. We never needed or desired the outcome, only wanted it. The gap between just one drink and waking up after passing out is filled with promises of “just one more won’t hurt.”

By exposing the brain to such extreme levels of inebriation, normal brain function is thrown into a state of imbalance. The brain and body barely have the time and rest necessary to recalibrate before the whole cycle is fired into motion again, taking you further and further away from a state of balance necessary for well-being. The relentless consumption and accompanying dopamine take place with increasing frequency until it’s associated with almost everything: every circumstance, feeling, person, mood, emotion, food, activity, and so on.

My suspicion is that because substances like alcohol provide an artificial sense of connection and acceptance, the dopamine system can’t tell the difference and makes you want it in an attempt to meet these survival needs. But because it is artificial, it’s not getting the real substance. If it were substantive, the system would recognise it as such and power down. Instead, the system is trying to compensate for the inauthenticity of it all and gets stuck in perpetual motion.

This may or may not be the case, but at the very least, in the beginning, drinking does lower inhibition and greases the wheels of social acceptance. You become conditioned to associate drinking with improved chances of group acceptance. When dependency ultimately moves you toward isolation, the conditioned response is a hollow substitute for group acceptance whether there is anyone there to belong with or not.

The good news it that you also want to not want. And herein lies the battle of dopamine. A topic for next time...

But before I go, remember: working on sobriety is an iterative process. We never fail, only learn. Be kind to yourself and never give up.

Marky

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